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Subject: OOfficial Discussion Thread for: RAW (May 29, 2017)
OORick
We Run
Posts 3656
Registered 12-27-2001 Location - The Birthplace of Aviation Member Is Offline
Mood: Flyered Up
posted on 5-29-2017 at 11:50 PM
OOfficial Discussion Thread for: RAW (May 29, 2017)
Tonight on RAW: with Extreme Rules just 6 nights away, WWE puts the 5 men involved in Sunday's 5-Way #1 Contender Match front and
center....
By and large, Finn Balor and Seth Rollins are the two favorites to win on Sunday, and get a one-off shot at Brock Lesnar's WWEU Title (Strowman
is assumed to be Lesnar's challenger for SummerSlam, while Reigns' next shot is likely to be WM34).... and conveniently enough, they are
split up into two separate feature matches tonight:
(1) Finn Balor vs. Samoa Joe vs. Bray Wyatt, and
(2) Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns
Both have a chance to be very good, and in very different ways.... Balor should be a unanimous underdog babyface, and that triple threat ought to have
great chemistry and straight-forward psychology... meantime, a red hot and conflicted crowd could make for a chaotic atmosphere for
Rollins/Reigns...
While those two matches are set in stone for tonight, not much of anything else is... but with the PPV card essentially full-up, we really only have
to service existing storylines, not go out and invent all kinds of new ones...
Dean Ambrose defending the IC Title against Miz comes with the stipulation that the title can change hands on a DQ, and I still fully expect some sort
of demonstration by Miz in which he easily goads Ambrose into losing his cool in the middle of a match tonight...
The Women's Title Match on Sunday features a kendo stick, and the underlying story here has to do with Bayley struggling to sink to the same
lows and bad behavior that Alexa Bliss is willing to go to... Bliss revels in the evil, Bayley, not so much...
And when given the chance to pick the "extreme" stip for Sunday's tag title match, the Hardy's surprisingly skipped ladders, entirely,
and went with a Ladder Match.... with the various singles matches among the 4 exhausted, I'm guessing we get some sort of non-match teaser that
hints at some kind of crazy highspot to come on Sunday...
The rest: Neville defends the Cruiserweight Title agaisnt Austin Aries on Sunday, in a Submissions Only Match; if I had to guess, I'd look for
Neville to get a match tonight to continue to get his usage of the Rings of Saturn over with fans (he's only just started using it, as opposed
to Aries, whose Last Chancery has been a go-to submission since he arrived).... Goldust turned on R-Truth, and also seemed to turn back the clock to
1996 in a pre-taped promo he did last week; the newly re-bizarred Goldust vs. Truth seems a lock for Sunday, though nothing is official just yet....
the Rich Swann/Noam Dar feud from "205 Live" has officially expanded into a mixed tag feud, with Sasha Banks teaming up with Swann to combat Dar and
Alica FAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUXXXX..... and it sure as hell seemed like Titus/Apollo were on track for a match against Enzo/Cass, but last week, a "mystery
attacker" took out Enzo backstage, and it sure as hell feels like they're trying to move Enzo & Cass in a different direction, all of a sudden;
my guess is that the Revival are behind the attack, though I don't think that leaves enough time to set up a match for Sunday.... where this
leaves Titus and Apollo, I have no idea....
That is all. End communication.
The flOOr is yours, OO Nation. Don't wait till after 11pm to post, either. Pre-show previewing and prognosticating is certainly welcome.
So discuss, debate, and rate!
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 7330
Registered 1-19-2008 Location Stupid Idiot Section Member Is Offline
Mood: ChinceMcMahon
posted on 5-30-2017 at 12:15 AM
quote:The Women's Title Match on Sunday features a kendo stick, and the underlying story here has to do with Bayley struggling to sink to the
same lows and bad behavior that Alexa Bliss is willing to go to... Bliss revels in the evil, Bayley, not so much...
She's not evil, you fiends. She's tiny and perfect and merely standing up for herself.
Swing-batta-batta-batta-soooo-wing! All she needs to do is get in the Tommy Dreamer or Sandman stance with the stick after hitting someone with it and
the achievement will be fully unlocked.
[Edited on 5/29/2017 by Paddlefoot]
You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know,
that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but
I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 12:50 AM
quote:Originally sung by Canadian soul singer PAdelefoot
"...Sandman stance..."
Yes, please.
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 7330
Registered 1-19-2008 Location Stupid Idiot Section Member Is Offline
Mood: ChinceMcMahon
posted on 5-30-2017 at 12:56 AM
I heard that Vince would get JBL to put Big Dick Johnson in a full nelson so he could repeatedly punch him in the stomach after writers meetings.
Vince liked doing it because it was just like hitting a pillow and the "doof! doof!" noises Dick would make as all the air was driven out of him,
prior to vomiting of course, were pretty goddamn funny. Dick ended up with PTSD as a result of working at Stamford but what the fuck anyway. At least
he got paid for putting up with it.
[Edited on 5/29/2017 by Paddlefoot]
You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know,
that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but
I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling
Il Palazzo
Fella
Posts 464
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 5-30-2017 at 01:03 AM
And now he's putting that expertise to use in Lucha Underground! Dreams DO come true.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 01:07 AM
Nev-R 4-get! 'Murica!!!!!
#HADDOCKFEST
ETA: God it The Miz, you had the line, "Habitual line-stepper" right fucking there!
ETA2: Okay, so Cesaro/Sheamus are winning on Sunday, but does the WWE have one of those rare 'get it right' cards up their sleeve to
re-ignite the #brokenhardys? STAY TUNE
ETA3: Elias Sampson needs Punishing.
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
Il Palazzo
Fella
Posts 464
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 5-30-2017 at 01:45 AM
WWE sure has been going through a lot of local jobbers in the past year. RIP background character from The Godfather.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
gobbledygooker
Sister Act 2
Posts 9269
Registered 12-17-2002 Location Charlotte, NC Member Is Offline
Mood:
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:17 AM
The problem with Raw right now, and the title scene in particular, is that you have a bunch of "ehhhhh"s battling for the title.
Wyatt's coming off a horrible feud with Orton that may have set them both back 10 years.
Joe always has the groundswell of support from hardcore fans as well as the apathy of people who don't know who he is.
Balor is moving away from the "Demon" gimmick which I'm completely fine with but he's lost the crowd segment that would pop for him
based on "Oooooooooh facepaint and a cool entrance!"
Rollins is pretty much fucked as a face based on reasons we've talked about before.
Reigns is Reigns.
FEEL THE EXCITEMENT, PAL!
"Hulk Hogan have the sex with some dumb bitch on the TV. The girl smart if she make the $$ from his bald ass but she also desperate to have sex with
the howdy doody like Hulk Hogan. He worse than Mel Gibson and I think now %10000 he prove he have grasshopper dick and raisin balls." - The Iron
Sheik
CM Crunk
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1675
Registered 7-20-2011 Location Unstuck frOOm Time Member Is Offline
Mood: Unpresidented
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:20 AM
Can we just start calling Bray "The Eater of Pinfalls?"
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:21 AM
Can't complain aboot none of that. My frustrations with Finn, Joe, Bray booking aside, that was fascinating to watch. They all looked fucking
great.
It's the writer monkeys folks, not the performers themselves. Thanks Vince y Bukkuke.
ETA: Hmm, I see Crunkers has graced us with his presence tonight.
#obviousshade #whathaveyoudonewithpapacrunkers
ETA2: Alt-Right Fake Nooz Revival on RAM!!!! YES! YES! YES!!!!
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
Il Palazzo
Fella
Posts 464
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:44 AM
I really kind of expected Big Cass to come running back to boot Graves off the platform. Or SOMETHING. ANYTHING!!!!!!
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
CM Crunk
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1675
Registered 7-20-2011 Location Unstuck frOOm Time Member Is Offline
Mood: Unpresidented
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:55 AM
quote:Originally posted by janerd75
ETA: Hmm, I see Crunkers has graced us with his presence tonight.
#obviousshade #whathaveyoudonewithpapacrunkers
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
Doing my best to fight through the apathy. The best I can manage is streaming RAM on my laptop to the left of me while I play Katamari Forever on the
TV in front of me as I stubbornly ignore a commission deadline.
Since I am listening along 95% and watching 5% could anyone clue me in on what the announce team was reacting to earlier coming back from commercial?
Did someone walk into frame? And have I missed anything with Corey walking off earlier after getting a text and showing it to Kurt?
Cherokee Jack
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1453
Registered 2-24-2009 Location New Orleans, LA Member Is Offline
Mood:
posted on 5-30-2017 at 02:59 AM
Ok, are we all in agreement that "This Is Your Life" segments need to never happen again? Jesus this is awful and it hasn't even gone on
nearly as long as the Foley-involved ones.
Also, this should be taken as a knock on Alexa at all. She's trying her damndest out there, and it's an admirable effort, but holy shit
this is bad.
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by Cherokee Jack]
I'm Cherokee Jack!
Il Palazzo
Fella
Posts 464
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:03 AM
I'll agree to that. It's had some amusing bits, but these kinds of things are never worth it. Also, I just realized it's kind of
surprising it took this long to get some Deletes going.
I think the one thing that could've almost-sort-of salvaged this would've been Bayley coming out and pointing out how none of that stuff
was hers and she didn't know any of the people.
Edit: Also, that PPV theme is shite.
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by Il Palazzo]
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:06 AM
quote:Originally posted by CM Crunk
Since I am listening along 95% and watching 5% could anyone clue me in on what the announce team was reacting to earlier coming back from commercial?
Did someone walk into frame? And have I missed anything with Corey walking off earlier after getting a text and showing it to Kurt?
I believe it was something "Cass Is Concerned About Who Walloped Enzo" related.
Also, Alexa, baby, what is you doing?!?!
Booker T: This is hard to watch.
The Shuckiest of Ducks and The Quackiest of Quacks were never more spoken, My N-est of Words.
ETA: Michael P.S. Hayes, Bischoff and motherfuckin' Jimmy C on the Network after RAM?!?!?!
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
Il Palazzo
Fella
Posts 464
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:12 AM
Enzo's never wrestling again at this rate. Also, his attacker should be revealed as Rikishi in a Power Wheels Hummer. It only makes ALL the
sense.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
CM Crunk
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1675
Registered 7-20-2011 Location Unstuck frOOm Time Member Is Offline
Mood: Unpresidented
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:12 AM
Had to mute that last segment. The "This is Your Life" segment, as a trope in pro-wrestling, has to die. It wasn't good when Mankind and The
Rock did it, and it hasn't been good the dozen or so times they've done it since. It's lazy and cringe-inducing. And I say that as
someone who enjoys Alexa on the mic.
PALATE CLEANSER TIME!
edit: just noticed it looks like my avatar is trying not to get distracted by dat booty.
[Edited on 5/30/2017 by CM Crunk]
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:30 AM
I've got Google yes I do, I've got Google how 'bout you?!?!
Also, given the setup from tonight's RAM, all the heels are winning this Sunday. Mayhap The WWE Presents #BrokenHardys� comes out of it?
ETA: Goldust and R-Truth 4 Lyfe!!!! Because I'm old and today's fag-et-y millenials don't know whut gud wrasslin' is!
#choppychoppypeepee
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 7330
Registered 1-19-2008 Location Stupid Idiot Section Member Is Offline
Mood: ChinceMcMahon
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:46 AM
I'm hurt bad, Murphy! (from excessively exploring myself to those gifs and pics).
(of the tiny girl, not the (ahem) other ones)
[Edited on 5/30/2017 by Paddlefoot]
You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know,
that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but
I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling
janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3766
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline
Mood: Lantern kick'n
posted on 5-30-2017 at 03:50 AM
quote:Originally posted by Paddlefoot
I'm hurt bad, Murphy! (from excessively exploring myself to those gifs and pics).
Hey look, it's the BOOO guy!!! Let's get past the PPV this Sunday Sunday SUNDAY!!! to see where they're headed!!!
ETA: Ain't no BOOs for that match. Tidy lil' SHIELD get together right there.
ETA2: Jesus, two minutes in and Dinner for 3 with Bisch, Hayes and Corny is worth waaaaay more than the $9.99 per month charge for the Network.
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
CamstunPWG187
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1585
Registered 5-2-2010 Location Harbin, China Member Is Offline
Mood: Barbeque
posted on 5-30-2017 at 05:15 AM
Read about the Alexa/Bayley segment, came in to this topic hoping for some good shitting.
Wasn't disappointed!
Katie Vick killer
The Rowdy One
Posts 2011
Registered 8-25-2003 Location w/ Randall Member Is Offline
Mood: Chin locked
posted on 5-30-2017 at 10:22 AM
The Extreme Rules pick em is posted for anyone who wants to play along
anglefan85
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1281
Registered 12-6-2005 Location Long Island, New York Member Is Offline
Mood: Relaxed
posted on 5-30-2017 at 04:01 PM
That This is Your Life segment was Old Day levels of cringe. Not even someone like Alexa Bliss was able to salvage that trainwreck. Probably the worst
part about it was when Bayley's friend said that instead of hanging out, all Bayley wanted to do was watch WWE Raw and Smackdown. They basically
just shit on their own product. There was also Bliss standing there laughing as she's mocking Bayley's childhood dream of becoming a WWE
Superstar. You know, the very career Alexa has right now, where she's on the very Raw that was just made to look like a show only losers
watch.
I did like the Goldust/R-Truth segment, though. Bringing back classic Goldust is a smart move, and Truth is showing that he can hold his own on the
mic against him. The blowoff match is most likely gonna be at Extreme Rules so as not to drag it out.
[Edited on 5-30-2017 by anglefan85]
The WWE: Where no one wins, unless you like Cena, in which case you are a sad little fanboy who will never get laid, but we are happy to take your
money away-Moosehead Jack
"She is an estrogen molotov cocktail. It'd be in your best interest not to piss her off."- My thoughts on Firewoman
"Kurt Angle is like a living vortex of the surreal. On the off chance he's not doing, saying or thinking crazy things, people connected to him
act crazy by association, caught in the gravitational pull of his insanity."- Ringout from FAN Forums
Frank Lloyd Wright
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1648
Registered 10-2-2007 Location Fallingwater Member Is Offline
Mood: Megalomaniac
posted on 5-30-2017 at 05:21 PM
They have to stop with the "This is Your Life" segments. Even someone as good on the mic as Bliss couldn't pull it out of the ditch. The
person(s) who wrote and approved this garbage for TV, should be fired and never work in this industry again.
I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth -- Oliver Reed
American architect, interior designer, writer, educator, and wrestling fan.
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 7330
Registered 1-19-2008 Location Stupid Idiot Section Member Is Offline
Mood: ChinceMcMahon
posted on 5-30-2017 at 05:43 PM
I wouldn't use that segment as a reason to condemn the entire company. It's more useful though as an illustration on how badly WWE has
been undercutting too many of the RAW/SD's that lead into a PPV with such stupid skits. That was pure wrestlecrap, more suitable for something
that Russo would have scripted for TNA at it's miserable worst, that was unfairly inflicted on two of the current top female performers. Bliss
is way better than Nikki was at the high-school mean-girl routine, mostly because almost all the time she's able to talk her way out of most of
the dumb things that go along with that particular role. Last night's one was too much of a doozy though. Not even The Rock or Austin or
pre-rehab HBK at their big-mouthed best could have made anything out of that pile of crap they made Alexa and Bayley work with.
I guess it's best to look at it as a sine wave. The high point of a good match here or there or the arrival of someone popular from NXT gets
countered later on by something completely idiotic. Vince & Bukkuky have moments where their touch is barely noticeable, and other times what they do
is so atrocious it's at the nadir of the wave cycle. We should be used to it by now but it sure is head-shaking baffling when it happens in
front of us.
[Edited on 5/30/2017 by Paddlefoot]
You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know,
that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but
I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling
it The Miz, you had the line, "Habitual line-stepper" right fucking there! 
