OORick
If There Was Ever a Time 
Posts 3679
Registered 12-27-2001 Location - The Birthplace of Aviation Member Is Offline Mood: Armstrong'd~!
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| posted on 7-4-2017 at 09:55 PM |
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OOfficial Discussion Thread for: SmackDown (July 4, 2017)
Tonight on SmackDown: WWE has done their best to try to pre-announce enough stuff so that fans will still maybe possibly hopefully remember
that there is a wrestling show happening on the 4th of July... of course, I say that, and a goodly percentage of WWE's audience doesn't
consider 7/4 a holiday, and right now, I myself, and personally looking at a strong likelihood that the weather will result in everybody huddling
inside, watching TV and drinking, but not cooking with fire or blowing any shit up.... but regardless, WWE didn't punt last night's RAW,
and doesn't seem to be willing to give up on tonight's SD, holiday considerations notwithstanding....
John Cena returns to TV for the first time since WM33, and he is now being called a "Free Agent".... normally, that label would suggest that RAW and
SD will have to vie for his exclusive rights, but in actuality, WWE is using the term in a way that makes Cena a PERMANENT Free Agent.... he will
bounce between brands, as he pleases, and will not be required to trade in his free agent status at any time.... or, at least, that's the most
recent backstage buzz... the fact that Cena is returning on SD is suggestive that his first major storyline will also be Tuesday-centric, but beyond
that, Cena will be above the law....
With tonight's main event slated to be a Battle Royale to determine a #1 Contender to Kevin Owens' US Title, that seems a logical place
for Cena to start... AJ Styles would seem to be the odds-on favorite to continue his chase (after his lone one-on-one shot at Owens ended less than
decisively, with a count out), but since he has a reasonable claim to a title shot even without winning the BR, you could also do a hot shot angle to
set up a US Title Match for Battleground, while saving the Owens/Styles rematch for the SummerSlam stage... so a Cena win and a Cena/Owens insta-match
would be a pretty straight forward way of getting Cena onto a PPV card that's less than 3 weeks away... we'll see...
Also tonight: Naomi defends the WOmen's Title against Lana, for the third time in 3 weeks... but Lana keeps pressing Naomi's buttons to
goad her into additional shots, rather than having a #1 Contender based on merit... Carmella lurks in the shadows with the MitB Briefcase, and if some
kind of wackiness results in Lana stealing the title, it would be a great spot for Carmella to pounce.... and personally -- as I've outlined a
few times already -- WWE should probably just go ahead and let the (male) fans get their way, and make Lana a babyface...
[SIDE NOTE: I really want big things for Rusev when he comes back to TV.... but am I a bad person for suddenly thinking that Rusev & Lana feuding with
Carmella & Ellsworth could be freaking high-larious?]
And we can't forget about the Rap Battle between the Usos and the New Day, "moderated" by Wale.... oh, wait.... yes we can....
With whatever time is left over, SD's other two major stories remain Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin, and two guys apparently feuding over
the Most Prestigious Title In Our Industry.... I wish I could be more clear on that last one, but it's been damned near 5 months since anything
remotely compelling was associated with the WWE Title, and I seem to have contracted some form of selective amnesia....
That is all. End communication....
The flOOr is yours, OO Nation. Don't wait till after 11pm to post, either. Pre-show previewing and prognosticating is certainly welcome.
So discuss, debate, and rate!
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janerd75
The Great One  
Posts 3879
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline Mood: Juan Trick Pony
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| posted on 7-4-2017 at 11:56 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by OORick
Tonight on SmackDown: WWE has done their best to try to pre-announce enough stuff so that fans will still maybe possibly hopefully remember
that there is a wrestling show happening on the 4th of July... of course, I say that, and a goodly percentage of WWE's audience doesn't
consider 7/4 a holiday...
Sum 
 
quote:
Originally posted by OORick
And we can't forget about the Rap Battle between the Usos and the New Day, "moderated" by Wale.... oh, wait.... yes we can....
Moar
There's going to be a what now? First, Ball-In-Hoop, now this? Lol j/k, I look forward to i
Double lol j/k, Happy 'Murica Day from the F-L-A
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
"This is the water and this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes, dark within." The Woodsman
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janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3879
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline Mood: Juan Trick Pony
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:11 AM |
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Lol, one of the biggest reactions Cena got was mentioning Reigns to resoundingly loud BOOOs. 
Oh look, it's Rusev! U.S.A! U.S.A! U.S.A! Also, his English healed up over his break too!
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
"This is the water and this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes, dark within." The Woodsman
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Il Palazzo
Showstopper 
Posts 503
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline Mood: Stepladder
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:25 AM |
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Have they done this thing with commercials before? It's weird.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
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Count Zero
The Rowdy One 
Posts 2204
Registered 1-29-2013 Location Canada East Member Is Offline Mood: Weeneedoo
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:39 AM |
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Did they do that picture-beside-picture commercial thing? Is that what you mean? If so, yus, they have done it before. I thought Tom had lost his
mind, if I remember correctly..
Now it's time for the CAWMELLUHBRAYSHUN!!!!! LIKE OHMIGAWD SO TOTES FABULOUS!
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the goon
Sister Act
Posts 6323
Registered 3-13-2004 Location Charlotte, NC Member Is Offline Mood:
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:42 AM |
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I'd like to officially declare this the greatest episode of Smackdown ever based solely on Carmella's shorts. 
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Il Palazzo
Showstopper
Posts 503
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline Mood: Stepladder
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:43 AM |
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Yeah, that was the thing.
I also take it Naomi's been a raver for a bit now? That's certainly a thing! The light-up belt is a nice touch. Sadly, it's destined
to one day be thrown into a garbage can by a female version of JBL and blown up.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
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janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3879
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline Mood: Juan Trick Pony
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:54 AM |
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Wut?
ETA: I'm guessing Tamina's going to train her now or something?
[Edited on 7-5-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
"This is the water and this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes, dark within." The Woodsman
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Count Zero
The Rowdy One
Posts 2204
Registered 1-29-2013 Location Canada East Member Is Offline Mood: Weeneedoo
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:55 AM |
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She has been a raver for awhile. it's GLOWrious.
And Wrestling Lana is now a dead gimmick? That was kind of crazy. Even crazier when Tamina went prison-mom on her and walked her outta there
like it's time for Mean Face lessons.
"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot
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Il Palazzo
Showstopper
Posts 503
Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline Mood: Stepladder
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 01:58 AM |
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Seriously. I kind of enjoyed it! But it was SO WEIRD. Perhaps enhanced due to my lack of regular SD viewing. And I now kind of feel bad for Lana.
OH BOY! A rap battle hosted by Tobias Whale! Or Prince Charles?
Edit: Oh, so it's Wally Trollman. Can't wait until he starts producing magic words.
Edit II: All attempts at joking about not knowing a specific rapper aside, I'm finding this segment sufficiently amusing. And so far one of the
less agonizing celebrity-type person moments.
Edit III: I also just noticed Rapper Man's Wolfpac shirt, and am also amused by that. Let's all take a moment and soak in the majesty of
Lex Luger's face!
[Edited on 7-5-2017 by Il Palazzo]
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
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LoveMuscle
And I am AWESOME
Posts 192
Registered 6-28-2007 Member Is Offline Mood: stiff
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:09 AM |
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Whoever wrote the New Day's raps doesn't know that stop signs are octagons, not hexagons.
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anglefan85
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1310
Registered 12-6-2005 Location Long Island, New York Member Is Offline Mood: Relaxed
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:11 AM |
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"Don't get all Rated-R like your boy Xavier Woods"
Holy shit, they went there!
The WWE: Where no one wins, unless you like Cena, in which case you are a sad little fanboy who will never get laid, but we are happy to take your
money away-Moosehead Jack
"She is an estrogen molotov cocktail. It'd be in your best interest not to piss her off."- My thoughts on Firewoman
"Kurt Angle is like a living vortex of the surreal. On the off chance he's not doing, saying or thinking crazy things, people connected to him
act crazy by association, caught in the gravitational pull of his insanity."- Ringout from FAN Forums
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janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3879
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline Mood: Juan Trick Pony
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:12 AM |
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Much like channels offering up an alternative to the halftime show during the Super Bowl, I too shall offer Jannertainment while whatever the WWE is
doing does its thing without me also participating in jamming forks in my ears and eyes at the same time. Buckle up, Buckaroos!
*[Edited because the scary rap men are gone and the Guatemalan Insanity Peppers wore off. Apologies.]*
Door #1
Door #2
Door #3
Door #4
Door #5
Here are some very very very NSFW outtakes from the upcumming Justice League film.
You're all very welcome!
[Edited on 7-5-2017 by janerd75]
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
"This is the water and this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes, dark within." The Woodsman
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LoveMuscle
And I am AWESOME
Posts 192
Registered 6-28-2007 Member Is Offline Mood: stiff
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:13 AM |
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What a BS ending. The Usos had the best zingers with the Xavier Woods sex tape and Kofi's ex-Jamaican background.
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Quentil
Showstopper
Posts 726
Registered 5-13-2003 Location Saratoga Springs, NY Member Is OnlineMood:
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:15 AM |
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I enjoyed the rap battle far more than I thought I would.
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the goon
Sister Act
Posts 6323
Registered 3-13-2004 Location Charlotte, NC Member Is Offline Mood:
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:22 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Quentil
I enjoyed the rap battle far more than I thought I would.
Yeah, that was way less of a trainwreck than I thought it would be. I mean, it was kind of a trainwreck, but still surprisingly entertaining (though I
thought the Usos brought it way stronger than New Day did).
quote:
Originally posted by anglefan85
"Don't get all Rated-R like your boy Xavier Woods"
Holy shit, they went there!
That was the line of the night. Fuck, that might even have been the line of the year!
Nash is only a few inches bigger than JBL and depending on how stiff he gets Punk should be able to take it. -JB King, meant in a totally non-sexual
way
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janerd75
The Great One
Posts 3879
Registered 1-28-2013 Member Is Offline Mood: Juan Trick Pony
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:30 AM |
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I've never been so happy to hear Orton speak.
"Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin'
interplanetary." - Wayne (Letterkenny)
"This is the water and this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes, dark within." The Woodsman
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LoveMuscle
And I am AWESOME
Posts 192
Registered 6-28-2007 Member Is Offline Mood: stiff
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:34 AM |
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So the flag match at Battleground will be the first time John Cena will be in action since Wrestlemania. That means if you were hoping to see him
wrestle tonight or the next two weeks, you're out of luck.
[Edited on 7-5-2017 by LoveMuscle]
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LoveMuscle
And I am AWESOME
Posts 192
Registered 6-28-2007 Member Is Offline Mood: stiff
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 02:43 AM |
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Mike Bennett looked small next to Sami Zayn. I don't know whether it's too early to say this, but he may be a better fit on 205 Live.
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Count Zero
The Rowdy One
Posts 2204
Registered 1-29-2013 Location Canada East Member Is Offline Mood: Weeneedoo
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| posted on 7-5-2017 at 03:01 AM |
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HA! I'm not the only person who remembers Booty Time USA. God that movie was so early90s. 
"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot
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CVD39
Fella
Posts 253
Registered 1-16-2013 Member Is Offline Mood:
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| posted on 7-8-2017 at 10:06 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Il Palazzo
Have they done this thing with commercials before? It's weird.
Everytime I see this it reminds me of the only match I ever saw that ended during a commercial break. It was on WWF Superstars (I think) during a
Terry Taylor squash match when he had the "Red Rooster" gimmick. And since it was on Superstars, it was on tape delay which made it even more
weird. Might've been Gorilla and the Brain in the studio and when they came back from it they just casually mentioned Terry Taylor won and oh
boy this next match..... I always think back on that everytime a match goes into a commercial.
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