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Posts 2166
Registered 6-27-2007 Location tumblr Member Is Offline
Mood: SJW
posted on 6-1-2016 at 09:21 PM
Matt Hardy Video - WTF Am I Watching?
williamssl
Steers and Queers
Posts 7070
Registered 1-11-2004 Location Hippieville Member Is Online
Mood: Fuck USC
posted on 6-1-2016 at 10:28 PM
The boys got high and had a friend film this and then, while still high, they posted it on the internet because "it's so fuckin' gnarly
awesome, dude"
Right? Only possible explanation. I mean surely no wrestling company, however big or small, would ever do something like this, right? Right???
Don't Mess With Texas
janerd75
The Rowdy One
Posts 2369
Registered 1-28-2013 Location Bix Nood Avenue Member Is Offline
Mood: Mah name is TOBY!!!
posted on 6-1-2016 at 10:48 PM
The answers, in no particular order:
1) The Hills Have Eyes levels of Appalachian inbreeding.
2) Meth.
3) Long term exposure to lead and asbestos particulates used in the construction of TNA rings.
4) Tainted meth.
5) Super meth.
6) CTE induced by Matt's skull being rammed repeatedly and violently into his headboard by Jeff when they play a game of "Gay's Okay
When Reby's Away".
7) Bath salt and krokodil infused meth with mint and a twist of lime.
[Edited on 6-1-2016 by janerd75]
�If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of A.I.D.S.� - Jimmy Carr
I'm not even sure what had more plastic in it-- that fake baby, or the misshapen fucking wad which was formerly Reby Sky's face.
Is everyone mad here?
Of course they are, and you are too... otherwise, you wouldn't have come here.
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 5525
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Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 12:00 AM
Terminal late-stage TNA certainly has some interesting aspects to it. Reby probably asked the plastic specialist to "give me the Sable" but ended up
with a last-days Moolah instead.
Turns out there was a Part One to this. Brother Nero!
[Edited on 6/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
Flash
The Rowdy One
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Mood:
posted on 6-2-2016 at 12:35 AM
Never watched them before, but I want to say that the two had some sort of YouTube show for a while there, so maybe this is just another episode of
that.
Life has been rough to those two.
janerd75
The Rowdy One
Posts 2369
Registered 1-28-2013 Location Bix Nood Avenue Member Is Offline
Mood: Mah name is TOBY!!!
posted on 6-2-2016 at 12:46 AM
My favorite aspects of the Part One video, in no particular order:
1) Screaming and wildly gesticulating in front of a non-fake baby used as a prop.
2) Wildly changing camera angles that obviously make no attempt to remotely maintain any type of Cin�ma v�rit� or even a Reno: 911 level of
realism.
3) Jeff Fucking Hardy coming off as lucid and reasonable in this segment.
My least favorite aspects, again in no particular order:
1) Reby didn't spike the aforementioned baby and overripe tomato its poor fucking head on the driveway to save it from a lifetime, however short
it may naturally be anyway, of meth induced insanity from its father, mother, and unclefather.
2) The Ultimate Warrior didn't materialize in the window of the SUV foreshadowing the impending destruction of the MWO*.
*I'll give you zero guesses as to what the "M" stands for.
�If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of A.I.D.S.� - Jimmy Carr
Posts 11365
Registered 6-25-2002 Location Sunny Seattle, WA Member Is Offline
Mood: Authoritized
posted on 6-2-2016 at 12:50 AM
This shit right here. Jeff Hardy vs Willow, and the aftermath (or is that aftermeth?)
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 5525
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Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:06 AM
Not re-signing AJ Styles, Austin Aries, Bobby Roode, Eric Young, or Samoa Joe was the best for business because we needed to give the money to these
guys instead to help capture the critical ....whatever demographic.
- Dixie "Derp" Carter
Stuff like that successfully covers both the "shamed to be a wrestling fan/shamed to be caught watching this" aspects quite efficiently. Even the
ICP would think that this was too stupid to be seen at The Gathering of the Juggalos. Just thought of how appropriate it would be if the audience was
really chanting "meth!meth!meth!" instead of "Jeff!Jeff!Jeff!" at the end.
[Edited on 6/2/2016 by Paddlefoot]
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
williamssl
Steers and Queers
Posts 7070
Registered 1-11-2004 Location Hippieville Member Is Online
Mood: Fuck USC
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:13 AM
The combined costs of the boys' makeup, Matt's hair dye, the Hollywood talent brought in for the proper scripting, and filming and
production crew who have taken this to new levels......was an investment decision that we knew would produce higher returns than on any of the
recently departed talent and was a no-brainer in the end. Oh and the table. That table was expensive. We got it at a garage sale but the seller
wouldn't let it go for less than $20. Oh and the baby doll, too. We had to bribe some little kid with $3 to give up her favorite doll.
Don't Mess With Texas
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 5525
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Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:20 AM
We really gotta start cutting Roman Reigns a break because he hasn't come anywhere near doing anything that repellent. Neither has WWE, not for
a very long time, not like since Big Daddy V, Jillian Hall's facial growth, or the Boogeyman. Even something as dumb as Santina Marella was
really only done for laughs.
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
janerd75
The Rowdy One
Posts 2369
Registered 1-28-2013 Location Bix Nood Avenue Member Is Offline
Mood: Mah name is TOBY!!!
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:34 AM
If the worst aspects of the state of Florida could be personified as a wrestling company, with Exhibit A of its collective psyche on display in the
video Thai posted, it would most certainly be TNA.
Jesus Christ please won't someone help me get out of this meth. Mess. Yeah no, I meant mes...no, you know what on second thought I absolutely
meant meth.
�If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of A.I.D.S.� - Jimmy Carr
Posts 8606
Registered 12-16-2008 Member Is Offline
Mood: YES!
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:35 AM
I dunno, I think Matt's over-the-top acting is funny. Kind of reminds me of Randy Marsh when he decided he was diseased with alcoholism with the
exaggerated verbiage and tongue-in-cheek character. I'm not convinced this angle is supposed to be taken super seriously. I'm pretty sure
you're supposed to think Matt is ridiculous.
"I'm a professional. I know exactly what I'm doing." - Jeff Hardy
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 5525
Registered 1-19-2008 Location in my safe space, damn you! Member Is Offline
Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 01:50 AM
quote:Originally posted by janerd75
If the worst aspects of the state of Florida could be personified as a wrestling company, with Exhibit A of its collective psyche on display in the
video Thai posted, it would most certainly be TNA.
Jesus Christ please won't someone help me get out of this meth. Mess. Yeah no, I meant mes...no, you know what on second thought I absolutely
meant meth.
Take the small comforts where you can. Like this year Baylor took over from Tallahassee as the football-player/rapist excuse-making capital of the
NCAA. SEC fans will only have to use half as much kerosene for their bathwater to get the icky feeling off now compared to when Saint Jameis was
muh-dikkin' around campus. Exult in being somewhat less morally scummy as a collective entity while you can!
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
janerd75
The Rowdy One
Posts 2369
Registered 1-28-2013 Location Bix Nood Avenue Member Is Offline
Mood: Mah name is TOBY!!!
posted on 6-2-2016 at 02:03 AM
quote:Originally posted by Matte
I dunno, I think Matt's over-the-top acting is funny. Kind of reminds me of Randy Marsh when he decided he was diseased with alcoholism with the
exaggerated verbiage and tongue-in-cheek character. I'm not convinced this angle is supposed to be taken super seriously. I'm pretty sure
you're supposed to think Matt is ridiculous.
Metth, whatever you're mainlining into your massive beautiful glistening ladydonger...
I...I think I'm going to move to Orlando and become a TNA groupie. Meh*, I had a good run.
*Meth. It's always going to be meth, isn't it?
�If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of A.I.D.S.� - Jimmy Carr
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Registered 2-25-2006 Location Cheddar Bay, NC Member Is Offline
Mood: Stepladder
posted on 6-2-2016 at 02:12 AM
Catching a link to the second video via the Botchamania Fanpage was pretty great thanks to referencing The Room and Garth Marenghi's Darkplace.
Cutting to a Dean Learner interview segment after it ended would've suited it well.
You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
Posts 5525
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Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 02:34 AM
quote:Originally posted by janerd75
I...I think I'm going to move to Orlando and become a TNA groupie. Meh*, I had a good run.
Take a look at the Impact Zone crowd before you do anything so rash. It's like that gaggle of freaks that surrounded Cleopatra and Antony in
HBO's Rome. Nothing of any good can ever happen in a place where white guys are wearing shorts and Hardy tees all year round.
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
G. Jonah Jameson
Showstopper
Posts 946
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Mood:
posted on 6-2-2016 at 03:23 AM
Is Matt Hardy's hair supposed to be Rogue or Bellatrix Lestrange?
anglefan85
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1015
Registered 12-6-2005 Location Long Island, New York Member Is Offline
Mood: Relaxed
posted on 6-2-2016 at 05:17 AM
I posted it earlier in the TNA thread, but really, this is something that needs to be posted again. All of the Hardy segments, in their entirely.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jzScgAhSt0
One part that stood out to me was when Matt rolled out of the ring and clearly botched it, but nobody bothered to edit that part, or do a retake, they
kept it in the shot. They taped this weeks in advance, and they couldn't be bothered to edit that out, or do another take.
The WWE: Where no one wins, unless you like Cena, in which case you are a sad little fanboy who will never get laid, but we are happy to take your
money away-Moosehead Jack
"She is an estrogen molotov cocktail. It'd be in your best interest not to piss her off."- My thoughts on Firewoman
"Kurt Angle is like a living vortex of the surreal. On the off chance he's not doing, saying or thinking crazy things, people connected to him
act crazy by association, caught in the gravitational pull of his insanity."- Ringout from FAN Forums
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni
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Mood: obsolete aryan
posted on 6-2-2016 at 05:34 AM
Looked to me like Matt cut his hand when he nailed Jeff with the prop bottle. Be even funnier if they have to postpone the match or do one another one
of their insipid swerves because of it.
You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.
Count Zero
Man of a Thousand Holds
Posts 1112
Registered 1-29-2013 Location Canada East Member Is Offline
Mood: splitting brandache
posted on 6-2-2016 at 07:49 AM
Oh god... This has its own thread?!?!?!
Though really, it is pretty disasterrific, so I guess it does deserve a certain amount of internet deconstruction... Something Something TNA?
Originally posted by williamssl
"That hasn't stopped us from doing this shit before!"
"Checkmate, sir. Checkmate"
janerd75
The Rowdy One
Posts 2369
Registered 1-28-2013 Location Bix Nood Avenue Member Is Offline
Mood: Mah name is TOBY!!!
posted on 6-2-2016 at 09:50 AM
�If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of A.I.D.S.� - Jimmy Carr
I feel like the best way that video could have ended is if the owner of the house showed up and started yelling at everyone that he was going to call
the cops if they didn't get off his property.
"The Seahawks are cool. Me and Tubby here hung out with them once at a Bruno Mars concert."-Jay and Silent Bob representing the Broncos on FOX NFL
Sunday.