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Author: Subject: OOfficial Discussion Thread for: RAW (May 22, 2017)
OORick
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 12:12 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
OOfficial Discussion Thread for: RAW (May 22, 2017)

Tonight on RAW: expect the show to focus heavily on 5 guys who have all now been thrown into a giant elimination match, to determine a new #1 Contender to Brock Lesnar's WWEU Title... it's one of those deal where there are certainly some pre-existing backstories with some of those guys, but for once, this really is more about winning a match for business reasons (the title) than personal ones....

The on-going rivalry between Seth Rollins and Samoa Joe will sure be the basis for at least one more match (either singles or tag) either tonight or next week... it should also be noted that Finn Balor has been the subject of Bray Wyatt's rantings and ravings on at least one occasion, and the "God" vs. "Demon" angle writes itself.... lastly, you've also got Roman Reigns in the mix, and he seems to be in a perpetual feud with Every Live Audience He Performs In Front Of....

Also in 2 weeks at Extreme Rules, we're all set with our other title matches: (1) Dean Ambrose defends the IC Title against The Miz, with the ANTI-Extreme stipulation that Ambrose can lose the title via DQ... of course, this sets up for Miz to push Ambrose's buttons like the annoying twerp he is, in order to illustrate just how easy it's gonna be for him to win the title..... (2) Alexa Bliss defends the Women's Title against former champ Bayley... the twist to the Obligatory Rematch is that Bayley has a chance to show a more aggressive side, as it will be a Kendo Stick on a Pole Match (after Bliss savaged Bayley with said implement last week)..... (3) there's no stipulation officially, but the Hardys defending the tag titles against Sheamus and Cesaro will almost certainly end up having ladders invovled... (4) also no official stip yet, but when Austin Aries takes another shot at Neville's Cruiserweight Title, some variation on No DQ would be the most obvious (Neville got purposely DQ'd to retain his title last time out)...

The move to throw all 5 top guys into one match also means WWE was coming up a bit short on the number of possible match-ups for Extreme Rules... that's why last week's shows also pulled of heel turns by both Goldust and Apollo Crews, which in turn creates two new PPV-ready storylines: Goldust vs. R-Truth, and Titus/Apollo vs. Enzo/Cass... plugging in secondary feuds from either the Women's Division or the Cruisers should be plenty to fill up the card....

That is all. End communication.

The flOOr is yours, OO Nation. Don't wait till after 11pm to post, either. Pre-show previewing and prognosticating is certainly welcome. So discuss, debate, and rate!

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Paddlefoot
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 01:34 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
When no one comments it means no one cares.





You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know, that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling

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Il Palazzo
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 01:40 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I'd meant to point out that when Bray whipped Roman into the corner near the end of their match, he was laying on the mat like a teenage girl and it was really weird. But then I didn't. Some stuff has happened since then.





You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.

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janerd75
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 01:46 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
When no one comments it means no one cares.


Makin' ribs. Still celebratin' Jinderella. Thinkin' aboot enterin' the Black Lodge. Here, this should cheer you up.



Mon dieu, Mizeses crank must taste like haddock-flavored cotton candy at this point. I believe this should satisfy your comment requirements for the evening.





"It will happen when it happens and not a moment before." - Me

Catch-As-Catch-Can: The Non-Specific Wrestling Thread

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Paddlefoot
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 01:55 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
.....mommy.....



Big Cass heel-turnery in progress? He did look pissed off at Enzo for taunting the brutes after last week's match.





You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know, that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling

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williamssl
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:02 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I am in favor of anything that results in "injury" to Enzo that keeps him off tv for a very long period of time.





Don't Mess With Texas

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janerd75
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:03 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Pauly DEEEE!

Also, if Finn really wants to get over I think this would be much better entrance music for him.



ETA: Brock would beat Finn the same way he beats his dick because they're both approximately the same size.

[Edited on 5-23-2017 by janerd75]





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Catch-As-Catch-Can: The Non-Specific Wrestling Thread

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scott19buckeye
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:24 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Oh yeah, how many heal turns can we smash together in a month span? I'm guessing Cass is turning (no hack intended) and I think the club helping out Balor along with the heel turn would work best with Lesner.
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Paddlefoot
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:27 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
+5 to Dar for making the goink-goink-goink face at Sasha.





You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know, that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling

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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:38 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
So wut'd I miss? I obviously didn't miss tiddies, thanksta J-gangsta. I saw Finn Balor fighting one of the Vanilla Bros, that was .. um... something I channel surfed through. Now I see a classic Goldust promo? What year is this?

Alexa Bliss interview? Hey, how's that sportsball thing going?

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Paddlefoot
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:44 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Count Zero

Alexa Bliss interview.............?


Gentlemen, start your boners.







You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know, that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling

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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:46 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
If she could do her interviews with her back turned to the camera, and without speaking? I'd be right there with ya.

dat ass, tho.





"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot

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Il Palazzo
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:47 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
HERESY. But I forgive you your sins, because....... I don't know. Goldust had a painted-on Lincoln beard. Yeah, that's a good reason.





You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.

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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:53 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Count Zero
If she could do her interviews with her back turned to the camera, and without speaking? I'd be right there with ya.

dat ass, tho.




Also,







"It will happen when it happens and not a moment before." - Me

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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 02:54 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Mea maxima culpa, e grazie Padre Palazzo.

Yes, I realize I just mixed Latin & Italian. Them's the beats. Er.. Breaks. Man, it's getting spunky in here.

So I just read part of a Jinterview conducted by SBNation's Cageside Seats thingee. I know it's sort of off-topic here, but I'm not sure I really have enough for a "full post" in rumorcrapz.

Basically, Vince is really happy with his work & willingness to improve, thinks he's been getting a good reaction, and likes the whole situation as it stands. Jinder also said he only found out he was winning on the day of the NetworkPerView. Wheee! News complete!





"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot

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janerd75
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:10 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Matt's lawn must look phenomenal since Se�or Benjamin has nothing but yardwork to do all day now. If them policecops can carry the wacky flame over on SD I don't see why Braouken Matt Hardy and Brotha Nero can't do it over on RAM. Nothin' but "DELETE" and "OBSOLETE" chants during this match. Don't you like making t-shirt money WWE? #fuckTNA

Lol, I wrote this right as Maggle tripped over saying "pick the stipulation" and he said "pick the spic" instead. Only in our dreams, Mags.

ETA: Also, it's great to see Jeff looking so healthy.

Also2, will the cage lead to BROKEN HARDYS?!?!? Tune in and find out!





[Edited on 5-23-2017 by janerd75]





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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:19 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I'm glad I'm not the only one who heared Maggle scrooch the poo. Er. Well, that's a whole other issue.



eta: If I were Tony Niese, I'd go straight at it too, Bookah.

Also, I'd go at the Main Event Scene, since dude is bigger than Finn Balor.

[Edited on 5-23-2017 by Count Zero]





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Il Palazzo
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:21 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I always seem to miss the best flubs and such. All I got was his earlier "Alexaviss" thing.





You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.

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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:27 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I also think 60% of the time, Maggle says "Booger" instead of "Booker". Dude needs to enunciate.





"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot

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Il Palazzo
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:32 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Or go in the other direction and just develop some kind of secret language comprised of incorrect names and various words combined together. We could get over any number of people having issues saying WWE Universe and just go with Dubyewdubyewnverzzzzzzz.





You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.

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janerd75
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:42 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Might have to start referring to Mickie as Lady Dolph for the way she flies around the ring even though it may just be extra glide assist from her Dumbo ear sized lady flapers.

ETA: SPOOKY DOOKY TIME! Follow the buzzwords!

[Edited on 5-23-2017 by janerd75]





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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:47 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
He could start calling Samoa Joekozuna's finisher the Coupe De Ville? And suddenly Finn Balor inherits the Helluva Stomp? ...I could enjoy this new Hypothetical Maggle.

Also, did I miss spooky dooky time?





"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot

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Il Palazzo
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:50 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Maybe in the tradition of those random backstage segments solely existing to throw out some cheap advertising for a fast food place and give guys like Adam Rose and Santino something to do, or whoever is more likely to show up these days (R-Truth maybe?), Bray can switch to constantly telling us to "follow the Blizzards." And then he serves everyone ice cream cake for Sister Abigail's birthday. It'd probably make just as much sense as his usual rants.





You did it, Nibbles. Now chew through my ball sack.

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Paddlefoot
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 03:57 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
But he's not full of more shit than any other Southern preacher that preceded him.





You know, everyone says it's not supposed to make sense, like that's the whole point, dude. And I'm just saying, you know, that's like an excuse for lazy storytelling. Just don't sell me shite and tell me it's gold, all right? I might be stoned, but I'm not high. You know what I mean?
- Cassidy from Preacher, commenting on The Big Lebowski and/or professional wrestling

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Count Zero
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posted on 5-23-2017 at 04:04 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Hypothetical Maggle could also call the Coquina Clutch: "That Time I Hung Out With Heidenreich".





"It's a WWE tradition, to do something un-right." --Paddlefoot

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