by Rick Scaia
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

For fans who want to be surprised by Thursday's UPN telecast of SmackDown!, this is your last warning to turn back!  But for those of you who don't care about spoilers (or who have significant others who frown upon you spending Valentine's Day in front of the TV, watching sweaty men rolling around with each other), I've compiled the full results from e-mail reports.

Here goes:

-  For Sunday Night Heat (overseas version, not the pre-PPV version):  DDP beat Christian to retain the Euro Title...  Jazz beat Might Molly to retain the Women's Title...  Rikishi pinned the Big Bossman...  Scotty 2 Hotty and Albert upset the Dudley Boyz.

-  SmackDown! opened with Vince McMahon and Stephanie McMahon cutting a promo about how they were together on the same page, again.  Vince says Triple H sinned by dissing his daughter and putting him on the mat on Monday night, and that as punishment, he'll be struck down at No Way Out.  A loss to Kurt Angle at the PPV is promised.  Steph says she burned a bunch of HHH's stuff, and that later tonight, she'll deliver a special Valentine.  Vince declares the SD! main event will be Angle/Undertaker vs. HHH/Maven.

-  Spike Dudley upset Booker T on a fluke roll-up.  Prior to the match, it was confirmed that Spike/Tazz will defend that tag titles at the PPV against Booker/Test.

-  Backstage, Ric Flair has Chris Jericho in for a chat.  Jericho refuses to leave the building at Flair's behest, since he's not afraid of Austin.  After some videotape review, Jericho changes his mind, but Flair says it's too late, because now he's decided Jericho will wrestle Kane tonight.

-  Billy and Chuck defeated the APA, when Chuck managed to hit Faarooq in the head with the "box of chocolates" (gimmicked with a metal plate) that was given to him for Valentine's Day by Billy.

-  Austin hit the ring for a "What?" laden promo in which he revealed that his drug of choice was the WWF Title, which he'll be bogart-ing this Sunday at the PPV.  Doesn't sound like much, but trust me, with the "What?"s it took like 10 minutes.

-  William Regal used the brass knucks to pin Val Venis in a match that was significantly shorter than the pre-match shenanigans by Venis (which involved getting a woman to first take HIS clothes off, before taking HER clothes off).  After the match, Edge attacked Regal on the entrance ramp.

-  Backstage, Jericho and Austin have a verbal confrontation in Jericho's dressing room.  The message is that Austin can take Jericho out whenever he wants.  But he doesn't want to tonight, so he leaves peacefully.

-  Goldust beat Tajiri in short order and was about to take out Torrie Wilson when Rob Van Dam made the save.

-  The Dudleys storm Flair's office, and demand to know why Test and Booker got a tag title shot at the PPV.  Then Lance Storm and Christian do the same thing.  So Flair announces a six-way match at the No Way Out PPV:  Duds vs. Storm/Christian vs. APA vs. Billy/Chuck vs. Albert/Scotty vs. the Hardys, with the winners going to WrestleMania to face the tag team champs.  Ummmm, interference from Hall and Nash, anyone?

-  Kane got a DQ win over Chris Jericho when Jericho got intentionally disqualified for using one of his title belts to whack Kane.  After the match, Austin snuck up on Jericho and gave him a beat-down in the ring.

-  A revised version of the "Lonely Road of Faith" video is show with tons of nWo footage edited in.  The final image is the nWo logo spray-painted over Vince McMahon Sr.'s picture.

-  Maven and Triple H beat Kurt Angle and the Undertaker by disqualification when Angle blatantly laid out HHH with a chairshot in front of the referee.  Flair tries to make the save after the match when UT and Angle continue the assault, but ultimately fails.  Vince and Stephanie finally hit the scene, and Steph reveals her Valentine's Day gift to HHH:  she announces she'll be the special ref for the HHH/Angle match at No Way Out.  End of show.

Be sure to either check out the as-broadcast version of SmackDown! tomorrow night on UPN or, barring that, to come on back here to OO for full coverage and fall-out on Friday!

E-MAIL RICK SCAIA
BROWSE THE OO ARCHIVES

Rick Scaia is a wrestling fan from Dayton, OH.  He's been doing this since 1995, but enjoyed it best when the suckers from SportsLine were actually PAYING him to be a fan.

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