by Rick Scaia
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

You can read on and find out... or you could always just hit BACK and let things be a surprise for you over the next few days.  Ah, who am I kidding?  If you clicked here, you ain't clicking BACK...

Remember: Heat is live on MTV (for the last time before moving to TNN) from Safeco Field on Sunday, so there are no spoilers for that.  But here are the results from last night's SD! brand tapings in San Jose, CA:

• Sean O'Haire and Kanyon won dark matches.
• Velocity Matches:  Bill DeMott beat a jobber... Funaki beat Jamie Noble...  Johnny Stamboli beat Tajiri.
• Matt Hardy and Shannon Moore beat Rey Mysterio and Brian Kendrick in the opening match.  A quick-but-good match, with Mysterio getting a heat sequence at about the 3 minute mark before powdering out to leave Kendrick to eat the Twist of Fate (actually, two of them, but one looked sloppy, so it was probably a re-do) from Hardy for the pinfall.  After the finish, Rey made a comeback and and took out Moore while Hardy made a run for the locker room.
• Backstage: Hulk Hogan arrived at the building with his son and Jimmy Hart.  Taped package:  Roddy Piper talks about Vince/Hogan.
• Eddie Guerrero beat Charlie Haas.  Clean, no interference at all, which was a bit surprising... Haas was winning on points, as he dominated much of the match with arm-related offense, but Eddie managed to roll him up out of nowhere for a pinfall.
• One of those five minute All Backstage Bits between Commercials segments: John Cena is in the house with a live rap, promising to do bad things to Brock Lesnar...  Lesnar provides a counterpoint, saying he's only focused on Angle at WM right now, and he'll deal with Cena after that...  Nathan Jones punks out Chuck Palumbo backstage, and gets more advice from the Undertaker about how to conduct himself....  Vince McMahon is shown training, vignette-style...  Nidia is angered when she notices Torrie Wilson's Playboy cover, and promises to ugly Torrie up in their match...
• Torrie Wilson beat Nidia, using a neck-breaker after several otherwise non-descript minutes of action.
• Backstage: Big Show and A-Train cut a promo on Nathan Jones.  Taped packages: Jimmy Hart talks about Vince/Hogan, and a new Sean O'Haire vignette is shown.
• Big Show and A-Train beat Chris Benoit and Rhyno by disqualification.  Benoit and Rhyno were doing fine until they got tossed out of the ring by Show and Albert, prompting Nathan Jones to run in and attack for the DQ.  Taker eventually ran in, too, and helped his partner fight off Show and A-Train.  Bleh.
• Hulk Hogan hit the ring for a lengthy ovation and a quick promo.  The important information from the segment: his match with Vince is now going to be a Street Fight, basically no holds barred.  
• Chavo Guerrero beat Shelton Benjamin in a manner very similar to the way Eddie beat Haas earlier.  There was no interference, and though Benjamin controlled the match early by attacking Chavo's leg, he lost when Chavo rolled him up out of nowhere.  After the match, Benoit/Rhyno came out for a look, and Eddie/Haas both got involved as well.  The brawl wound up degenerating into Benoit and Rhyno punking out Team Angle.
• Backstage: Kurt Angle infiltrated Brock Lesnar's locker room, all by himself.  He cut an intense promo, talking about even if WM19 is his last match, he has no regrets, because he's not backing down from Lesnar.  He even tells Lesnar to be careful, because HE might be the one to leave WM19 injured and with no future career.  Lesnar listened to Angle's speech, but in the end, said he still feels he's taking the title at WrestleMania.  Taped package:  More of Vince's training is shown.  Also: the full 10-match WM card is hyped.
• In the main event, the returning John Cena pinned Rikishi with an impressive-looking Death Valley Driver.  Though he did have to endure a Stinkface, Cena rallied to win decisively.  After the match, Cena called out Brock Lesnar, but Lesnar didn't come out.  So Cena left the ring for the back, and presumably, that's where the broadcast will end on Thursday.  However, for the live crowd, Cena came back out a minute or so later and kept putting the bad mouth on Lesnar and San Jose; so Lesnar came out, and after a staredown and a brief tussle, F-5'ed Cena to send the live crowd home happy.

The Fed, rightly seems like they were contented with the WM19 line-up and the hype for most of the 10 matches that'll be happening there... and spent the main event essentially setting things up for after WM.  That's a pretty unique and ballsy move, but I think it's one that'll pay off.  Cena's and his gimmick are kind of in the right place at the right time, and should be a sweet foil to Lesnar for a month or two after Mania.

Check out SD! as it airs tomorrow night, or come on back here to OO on Friday for complete results and analysis....
  

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Rick Scaia is a wrestling fan from Dayton, OH.  He's been doing this since 1995, but enjoyed it best when the suckers from SportsLine were actually PAYING him to be a fan.

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