Wrestling News, Analysis and Commentary

 
News  -/-  Recaps  -/-  Columns  -/-  Features  -/-  Reference  -/-  Archives  -/-  Interact  -/-  Site Info
 

Donate to Online Onslaught!
CLICK HERE TO HELP KEEP OO ALIVE!
MAIN PAGE
NEWS
     Daily Onslaught
RECAPS
     RAW
     SmackDown!
     PPV
     NWA-TNA
     Heat
     Velocity
     Other 
COLUMNS
     Obtuse Angle
     RAW Satire
     The Broad
         Perspective

     Inside the Ropes
     OOld Tyme
         Rasslin' Revue
    
Circa/Dungeon 
     Title Wave
    
Crashing the
         Boards

     Deconstruction
     Smarky Awards
     Big in Japan
     Guest Columnists
     2 Out of 3 Falls
     Devil's Due
     The Ring
     The Little Things
     Timeline
    
SK Rants
    
The Mac Files
     Sq'd Circle Jerk
     TWiFW
FEATURES
     RAW vs. SD!:
         Brand Battle
 
     Cheap Heat 
     Year in Review
     Monday Wars
     Road to WM 

     Interviews
REFERENCE
     Title Histories
     Real Names
     PPV Results
     Smart Glossary
     Birthdays 
ARCHIVES 
INTERACT
     Message Boards
     Live Chat 
SITE INFO
     Contact
     OO History

If you attend a live show, or have any other news for us, just send an e-mail to this address!  We'd also love to hear from you if you've got suggestions or complaints about the site...  let us have it!

 
OOLD SCHOOL  
"Yeah Boss, Chucky vs. Hogan Sounds
Like a GREAT Idea!" 

July 17, 2003

by Rick Scaia  
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

 

[NOTE FROM THE PRESENT DAY: With some of WWE's current top storylines turning into either fire-laden or McMahon-centric lame-a-thons, and with recent word that Terry Taylor is to be released by the company likely due to his frequent differences of opinion with Vince McMahon, this reprise of a 1998 column covering the role of Yes-man-ism in WCW's steady decline to #2 in the ratings seems a bit pertinent.  I mean, things aren't nearly as bad as the Hogan/Warrior feud got back then in WCW, nor have we been subjected to anything as mind-bendingly retarded as a killer doll coming to life to terrorize our favorite wrestling shows... but still, one must wonder if WWE wouldn't benefit from somebody putting his neck -- and his job -- on the line by voicing the question, "Uh, Steph, do you really think anyone is gonna care about you wrestling Sable?".  Or: "You're want to do WHAT to Jim Ross, Gewirtz?".  Or, most dangerously: "You sure you can't get that point across in about one-third the time, there, Mr. McMahon?".

I fully understand the value of having everyone in a company on the same page.  But being on the same page should not require repressing one's own good judgment.  I don't really know for sure if that's an issue in today's WWE... but we can have our suspicions.  And we can also go back 5 years to a time when it was CLEARLY an issue in WCW's death spiral.  Enjoy...]


Rick Scaia Writing as "Big Daddy Who?"
nWWWo.com Column, Originally Published October 16, 1998

So, it's been a while, no? Figure since I've been away for a bit, there's no better way to get back in my nWWWo groove than with a few now-customary comments directed towards Mark Madden before getting into the column, proper.

I mean, did you see his latest comments about how Eric Bischoff is the one to thank for wrestling's current boom? About what a ballsy and creative genius the guy is? What a dangerous killing machine Eric is? About how his hair is so soft and manageable? His ass so firm and tight? And his penis so incredibly large?

Yeah, I made those last parts up. But I only had to because WCWWrestling.com wouldn't publish the uncensored version of the column Madden submitted (originally titled "Kissing My Boss' Ass While Giving Him a Reach-Around... Figuratively Speaking, of Course").

Here's one I didn't make up: "Eric Bischoff is the leader of the pro wrestling industry. And that's the bottom line, because the facts say so."

Whatever.

Competition isn't created out of thin air; it's a two way street. What Eric did was take an uncompetitive company and at least get them into the battle for the first time; he even had them winning decisively in the early rounds. Now things are different; not 180 degrees different, but different enough that claims of "leading the wrestling world" are utterly ridiculous. And where are the "facts?" What facts there are don't point to ANY decisive "leader."

I could go on and on (and on and on) about this topic, but for two things. (1) One thing Madden is more right about than most of you are honest enough to admit is that a big reason we don't like Bischoff is jealousy; so hell, I'll admit it.... I'm just cocky and naive enough to think I could run a better wrestling company if I had that much money to work with. And to think I'd get paid for it... hell yeah, I'm a jealous SOB! And (2) You'll be surprised to learn that ultimately, this week's column is not designed to have much to do with Madden's kissing of Bischoff's ass... after all, Scott Keith pretty much tore up Madden for these comments in a Rant over on WrestleManiacs.Com already.

Personally, I believe Madden made those comments basically to stir the pot. To generate EXACTLY this response from the "smart marks" he derisively mentions each and every week. I wouldn't be surprised if he won a bet the second the Net Cop's Rant was published. Mission accomplished, Mark.

I suspect this from Madden because the alternative would be difficult to accept: that Madden really believes that line of banter, and is therefore nothing but a driveling yes-man at a time when the LAST THING that WCW needs is yes-men.

Think about it.... this is the same company that -- just 3 years ago, mind you -- was doing "Dungeon of Doom" mini-movies with the "son of Andre the Giant." Then, somebody got smart, realized they needed to change something, and within a year, BANG! Nash and Hall are brought in and put over as "cool" heels, Hollywood Hogan turns evil, people start to care. Quite a turnaround, and quite a change from what was "business as usual."

If you MUST give credit to just one man -- instead of being fair and spreading it around to everybody who played a part in WCW's resurgence -- then fine, give it to Bischoff. But now that WCW is floundering (Warrior in the mirror? Chucky? This stuff almost makes those mini-movies seem palatable...), give him the blame, too. What's that you say? It's not all his fault? You can't have it both ways....

At the beginning, Bischoff was surrounded by people who took his direction and helped him accomplish his goals. Now, he's surrounded by people who apparently are just there getting a check. "Sure boss, the Warrior-in-the-mirror skit will work great," they're telling him. They've either got to get their share of the credit for past success, or be left out from the blame for current missteps.

The worst part is, WCW SHOULD be doing even better than they did during that fateful summer of '96. Since then, they've picked up even MORE top name talent. Bret Hart, Warrior, Piper, Hennig, Bulldog. They've developed DDP and Goldberg into marketable stars. But they can't put the pieces together. And they sure aren't dominating the "wrestling war" like they were 2 years ago, either.

It's gotta be the collective lack of spine among WCW employees... no doubt a result of years of an elitist power structure pretty much running everything, but still, a lack of spine nonetheless. Did no one in the front office stop and think for a second that turning Warrior into a really lame version of "Batman" would wind up being a total clusterfuck? I'm guessing some people DID realize this, but decided "Well, it's what Bischoff and Warrior want, so the only thing I'd accomplish by voicing a differing opinion would be to get fired." That's no way to do business.

Here's a possible twist. Maybe Bischoff has turned into the yes man himself? Two years ago, he probably had to campaign a bit to get his buddy Hogan to "see the light" and turn heel to revitalize his career. He went against the grain, and it worked.

Now, it seems more like whatever Hogan wants to do, he can do. "Sure, Hollywood, you go out there and eat up entire quarter hour segments with lame interviews. Just let me know when you want that win back from Goldberg," is the new Bischoff policy.

Here's another one that may ring a bell: "OK, Mr. Turner Executive, even though it'll be totally lame and ruin my wrestling show, I'll try to promote your killer doll, Chucky, on Nitro. Because you told me to."

Or maybe: "Yeah, Warrior, we don't want to tire you out, so for your first 3 months in WCW, we won't have you engage in a single physical encounter with anyone. We'll try to trick fans into caring about you using smoke and mirrors. Literally."

Not that this would be any excuse. Maybe there are forces even more powerful than the Almighty Bisch at work here. But c'mon, there are always ways to deal with that kind of thing. Like if Hollywood Hogan is running (and ruining) the show, and his segments get the lowest quarter hour ratings of the night, then cut the guy loose. Warrior's not paying dividends? Get him off TV and let him stew back in the Arizona desert.

How do you deal with Turner executives looking to take advantage of high TV ratings? That I can't answer... but I will say that Bischoff had no problems taking advantage of his place in a prosperous media empire (getting a prime time TV slot back in 1995 that his company really didn't deserve, having the financial backing to go out and sign 90% of the main event wrestling talent from the past decade, etc...). So now there's a downside? The proverbial "golden handcuffs," if you whe-eeeel? Deal with it, cuz I don't want to hear the bitching.  

I'm sure there are people with vision who work for WCW... they just aren't being listened to. And whatever you may think, I don't LIKE IT when WCW flounders. If there were two wrestling companies putting on great Monday night shows every week, I'd be twice as happy every Monday night. [I do, however, enjoy having the superlative wit and insight to poke fun at the fact that there is at least one wrestling company that routinely fails to entertain me on Mondays.] So guys (and/or ladies) stand up and take control of your wrestling company! Follow your dreams, you can reach your goals. I'm living proof...

And in the meantime, let me digress just a bit about Hogan. Is there still a place for him in wrestling? Sure. Would WCW be best served to tell him to take a flying leap? Maybe, maybe not; it's up to Hogan. Does he want to manage his career at this point, or can he trust somebody to manage it for him? I'm starting to think that wrestling has passed him by; if the guy can't even make us care about a feud with Warrior (that should have been golden), then I'm thinking he's officially lost his touch. He should let the bookers do the booking, and go out there and be a performer.

But is WCW the place where he can trust somebody to manage his career through its final stages? I certainly wouldn't be sold. Look at the debacle Ric Flair's waning years have turned into.

Hogan wants to retire a babyface. Hell, I want him to retire a babyface. I've got my problems with the guy now, but I grew up on the yellow and the red, and there's a least a few months of sentimental Hulk-a-Mania built up inside me. Problem is, nobody in WCW has the creativity or the talent to bring that old Hulkster back and make it work.

There is only one man with the grapefruit-sized balls to stand up to Hogan and make him realize what needs to be done. Only one man diabolical enough as a heel to make Hogan seem palatable again. Only one man who's got what it takes to make the world care about Hulk-a-Mania one last time.

Vince McMahon.

No, I ain't pulling a Vince Russo here (although, unlike the recent Madden column, Russo has the decency to admit that his hero worship of his boss is just one man respecting another, not "factual" proof of his boss' superiority)... I'm just saying that it's gonna take a creative team with a clear vision (not an over-worked exec surrounded by yes-men) and a mega-over heel (nobody in WCW currently fits this mold) to provide Hogan the opportunity with one last run as a yellow and red wearing babyface. Vince McMahon and the WWF could do it.

The question remains however, if they SHOULD do it.

I can live without it. But if the opportunity presents itself, what'd be so terrible about a year-long return of Hogan, capped off with a retirement match at a WrestleMania, complete with post-match pose-down? Nothing at all....

But it'd only happen if the folks at the WWF didn't bow down to each and every demand of Hogan's. If they showed some spine. If they were completely devoid of yes-men. If they worked together to exchange ideas and put out the best possible program.

Something that WCW just doesn't have going for 'em right now.

Of course, at this point, I expect each and every one of you to e-mail me and tell me just how brilliant and insightful you think I am. Here on the internet, yes-men are GOOD things.

Or maybe I'll live if you sit back and realize that for all my bluster, I'm just one guy passing along My Own Damned Opinion.....

E-MAIL RICK SCAIA  
BROWSE THE OO ARCHIVES

Rick Scaia is a wrestling fan from Dayton, OH.  He's been doing this since 1995, but enjoyed it best when the suckers from SportsLine were actually PAYING him to be a fan.


  
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Bonding Exercises
 
RAW RECAP: The New Guy Blows It
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Night of Champions 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: 18 Seconds? NO! NO! NO!
 
RAW RECAP: The Show Must Go On
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Boot Gets the Boot
 
RAW RECAP: Heyman Lands an Expansion Franchise
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Losing is the new Winning
 
RAW RECAP: Say My Name
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Deja Vu All Over Again
 
RAW RECAP: Dignity Before Gold?
 
PPV RECAP: SummerSlam 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Backfired!
 
RAW RECAP: Bigger IS Better
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Hitting with Two Strikes
 
RAW RECAP: Heel, or Tweener?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Destiny Do-Over
 
RAW RECAP: CM Punk is Not a Fan of Dwayne
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Returnening
 
RAW RECAP: Countdown to 1000
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Money in the Bank 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Friday Night ZackDown
 
RAW RECAP: Closure's a Bitch
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: In-BRO-pendence Day
 
RAW RECAP: Crazy Gets What Crazy Wants
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Five Surprising MitB Deposits
 
RAW RECAP: Weeeellll, It's a Big MitB
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: #striketwo
 
RAW RECAP: Johnny B. Gone
 
PPV RECAP: WWE No Way Out 2012
 
RAW RECAP: Crazy Go Nuts
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: You're Welcome
 
RAW RECAP: Be a Star, My Ass
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Needs More Kane?
 
RAW RECAP: You Can't See Him
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Lady Power
 
RAW RECAP: Big Johnny Still in Charge
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Over the Limit 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: One Gullible Fella
 
RAW RECAP: Anvil, or Red Herring?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Everybody Hates Berto
 
RAW RECAP: Look Who's Back
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Care to go Best of Five?
 
RAW RECAP: An Ace Up His Sleeve
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Extreme Rules 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Sh-Sh-Sheamus and the nOObs
 
RAW RECAP: Edge, the Motivational Speaker?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: AJ is Angry, Jilted
 
RAW RECAP: Maybe Cena DOES Suck?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: No! No! No!
 
RAW RECAP: Brock's a Jerk
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Back with a Bang
 
RAW RECAP: Yes! Yes! Yes!
 
PPV RECAP: WWE WrestleMania 28

 

 

 


All contents are Copyright 1995-2014 by OOWrestling.com.  All rights reserved.
This website is not affiliated with WWE or any other professional wrestling organization.  Privacy Statement.