Though I've thrown together a few PPV Previews and Recaps lately, I realize it's been about 2 weeks since I got you all caught up on news.
 

So, for you Fine Readers, I shall make the Ol' College Try and see if I can't make sure you're up to speed on all of the relatively important things that have gone or are going down in the world of wrestling.

And by "relatively important," I mean "you won't see Brooke Hogan's name nor any details about her upcoming bookings here." Because any

So let's just cut the crap and get on with it:

• Last night's TNA Bound for Glory PPV was 2006's version of the company's Signature Show. Like last year's inaugural version, the event seemed predicated on Jeff Jarrett FINALLY losing his title in a main event that featured a bad ass special referee. And for the second time in BfG's epic history, that's pretty much how things turned out in the end.
   
  But more telling: for the second time in BfG's hallowed history, that main event title change came off feeling like far from the best match or best story on the show.
   
  Not only did you have a tag title match stealing the show last night, but the entire company seems to be stuck under this cloud of "What is TNA gonna do with Kurt Angle, and when?". It's kinda hard to get excited about Sting as the company's "hired legend" winning the title when, as of 4 weeks ago, TNA's has thrown its promotional weight behind casting Angle in that role.
   
  With the somewhat unfocused promotional effort sapping a bit of the Big Time Once A Year Extravaganza Vibe from the event, TNA was also snakebitten by their choice of venues. Wanting to escape the ImpactZone in Orlando, to create a bigger and more unique feel, TNA chose Detroit. Not knowing that, when the time came, they'd be up against the Detroit Tigers playing Game 2 of the World Series a few miles up the road. D'oh. After initial ticket sales were already disappointing, the World Series almost assuredly killed off any significant walk-up audience. Last I heard, there were a little over 2000 paid, with no real expectations of topping 3000. The number of fans in the building was still  gonna end up looking respectable, no matter what, though. Cuz if TNA's knows how to do anything well, it's letting people into their shows for free. ZING~! [TNA also cancelled Friday's house show in Toledo, OH, due to -- regardless of what you read elsewhere -- sluggish ticket sales not making it worth their while if they could keep the talent rested and get a one day headstart on pre-production at the arena.]
   
  But whatever speedbumps seemed to be keeping the Bound for Glory hype machine from ever hitting top speed didn't seem to stop the company from busting out all the bells and whistles. With three title changes, plenty of screentime for new golden boy Kurt angle, and a few mild little surprises, BfG still came dressed to impress. A few technical problems sounded like they put a damper on things, but as always, you had the in-ring product delivering strong with few -- if any -- holes (but also, outside of the tag team cage match, few -- if any -- video keepers).
   
  Before the end of the afternoon, I expect Jason Longshore's Bound for Glory Recap to be available to satisfy all your curiosities. Click now, and it might be a deadline, but I promise: it'll be there, and it'll contain all the details you need.
   
  But also, a few quick thoughts of my own....
   
  Austin Starr isn't just the placekicker of the Indiana Hoosiers, anymore. Now he's also the winner of the Kevin Nash X Division Invitational Thingie. And Alex Shelley was none too pleased? People keep wondering who Nash'll be willing to put over when all this is said and done (since the answer to that question wasn't -- and shouldn't have been -- "Chris Sabin"), so maybe we're finally starting to see some hints in that direction, here?
   
  Christian over Rhino in the street fight is definitely not the outcome I expected to hear. I thought if there was a place on the card to do something a little cheesy and crowd pleasing to take advantage of the unique venue, it was here. You could have had some Hometown Detroit Hero lend a hand to hometown boy Rhino to get the Feel Good Win of the Century. If Sean Casey hadn't been busy driving in key RBIs in the World Series (Way to Go, Mayor!), I'm sure he would have been glad to do it. And if Kid Rock's midget hadn't died, he would have been PERFECT (didn't he previously foil some other evil plot of Edge and Christian's on WWF TV? FEEL THE CONTINUITY~!). But given Sting's title win, this does solidly position Christian as his first challenger. Only concern: are we sure the TNA Wankers will stick with Sting over Christian? I'm not sure I am.
   
  Along the same lines: LAX's tag title win was necessary, since it frees up Styles and Daniels to freshen up the singles scene. But I'm not 100% sure that their next feuds/defenses are gonna go down exactly as planned. LAX as champs it theoretically good because of the Dudleys and AMW as strong babyface challengers. But if there's one thing the Wankers like, it's their OMG WORKRATE. I can see them adopting LAX as babyfaces (or at least, as half-faces, like they did with Team Canada, despite the fact that at no point was Team Canada booked as having anything but despicable characteristics). The fans might mutiny against the Dudleys a bit easier than against AMW (just because the Duds are always one hairsbreadth away from becoming a parody of themselves).... but it's a danger either way. Which speaks ill of the ImpactZone Wankers, because as of last Thursday night, Gail Kim has gained sole custody of the vaunted Trish Sympathy Gene, and anybody who doesn't want to get in line behind me to punch Homicide in his stupid meaniehead face can't be my friend. I hate him. Twice as much as I hate Gonnad.
   
  I think that's enough about the PPV. Again, what you'll really want to check out is Jason's recap....
   
  
• But that's far from the last bit of TNA I want to discuss. Because as part of the build up to BfG last week, Kurt Angle did a conference call and answered a ton of fan questions (ostensibly "wrestling media" questions, but the invite was open to pretty much anybody with a wrestling website -- including this one -- and on top of that, you know my stance that there is No Such Thing as "wrestling media" or a "wrestling journalist").
   
  And it's stirred up more than mild controversies. I was doing some site back-ups over the weekend, and I think I saw that there was a thread about this on the OO Forums, so maybe check that for a more detailed account of the call.... but the short version is this: 
   
  Kurt thinks he's awesome, and will single-handedly triple TNA's ratings because his jump is just as important as Hulk Hogan's jump to WCW in 1994. Kurt thinks Vince McMahon is a jerk who treated him unfairly and asked him to work when Kurt needed time off. Kurt thinks he unilaterally quit WWE, and the company didn't "mutually release" him. Kurt thinks he could easily beat everybody in MMA if he wanted to. Kurt thinks his TNA ring entrance is "easily the best in the business today." Kurt, in short, thinks a lot of things.
   
  Not all of them seem to make a whole lot of sense, though.
   
  It got to the point where you couldn't tell the line between the self-confidence and the delusional. Where you couldn't tell if he was being a salesman trying to convince US, or if he was just flapping his gums in an attempt to convince HIMSELF of certain things. And to me, that was more than a bit off-putting.
   
  Believe me, I've got ZERO problem with confidence and the aloofness and other things that go along with knowing one's awesome. We, the fans, have handed Kurt how many awards and accolades over the years, declaring him the best? Too many to count. If we all think he rules, Kurt's under no obligation to pretend it isn't true.
   
  I consider this to be the Barry Bonds Principle. Knowing you're good might make you cocky. Knowing you're quite possibly the best? That's gonna change your world view even more. And it's a jealous or petty man who is gonna bitch and moan if a Barry Bonds or a Kurt Angle becomes self-aware. Then again, I'm the one who laughed and laughed everytime Bonds gas-faced a member of the media, or a fans compalined that Bonds wasn't accessible enough. Hey tards: he wasn't trying to be your friend, he was trying to be a good baseball player. Four consecutive MVP Awards tells me he prioritized correctly.
   
  But here, it strikes me that this is where we could get into an even more involved breakdown of how the Bonds/Angle comparison actually works really well. And not just because both had to shave their heads in their later years.
   
  Both had success in two stages. Bonds won 3 MVPs with the Pirates in the late 80s/early 90s; despite the accolades, there was little "sexy" about this Bonds, in the media sense. He was a multi-tool player (not a pure power hitter, yet) and played for a small market team, and was a guy who didn't make waves. In the early 2000s, Bonds won 4 more MVPs, but did it as a record setting slugger who frequently ended up in the headlines, as much because of his home run prowess as because of perceived problems he had with management, the media, and teammates. Angle had *his* first success winning the 1996 Olympic Gold Medal in the decidedly-unsexy sport of amateur wrestling. For better or for worse, he multiplied his audience/fanbase by an order of magnitude by "going pro" with the WWF, however, and experience equivalent success there which actually catapulted him to national stardom. Angle has always been an attention-grabber due to his stellar, riveting performances, but has also lately become a lightning rod for backstage turmoil.
   
  Both now face suspicions about just how much their performances may have been aided by drug use that might have been of either legal and/or moral dubiousness. Bonds suspected use of growth hormone or other cutting edge steroids may have evaded Major League Baseball's Letter of the Law (and really, shame on Baseball for that as much as shame on Bonds or anyone else for taking advantage), but still would have given him a massive boost in strength, power, and performance over somebody not duplicating his regimen. Angle almost certainly dabbled in these performance enhancing substances, as well (given the easily visible changes in his physique over time), but the issue in play here is how Angle's use of pain killers kept him performing at a passable level in the ring, despite the fact that he was suffering from injuries that should have kept him sidelined. Even with WWE benching Angle frequently over the past 3 years, how many times did Angle turn to pharmaceutical help to keep him going in the ring? We won't know, but we can guess with confidence that the answer isn't "zero."
   
  Both Bonds and Angle are now faced with the very real possibility of ending their careers with whimpers, instead of bangs. Bonds, now unable to enjoy the healing powers of HGH, has a body that is breaking down and that needs to be moved over to the American League, where it can be a designated hitter. One season as a DH, and he'll likely break Hank Aaron's home run record, but many will view it as an empty accomplishment, and celebration may be muted in the fact of questions about just how much assistance Bonds got from steroids. Angle, his body breaking down and supposedly not abusing pain killers any more to mask the pain, has a body that has already moved on to wrestling's version of the American League: TNA, where Kurt only has to work 3 days per month. That's as close to DH'ing as you'll get in rasslin'. And Kurt may rack up some wins, maybe even an NWA Title (to become the only man other than Ric Flair to hold the WWF, WCW, and NWA Titles), but let's face it: celebration will be muted. Because TNA and the NWA Title are pretty meaningless on the national stage at this point, and you won't find many wrestling fans who give a crap about what Angle accomplishes outside of WWE.
   
  And finally: both Bonds and Angle have always had reputations for being kind of bristly assholes, which (up until recently, anyway) was the worst you could say about them. And like I said above: I respect, maybe even LIKE, that. The closer you are to being the best, the more right you have to a bit of swagger. You're not OBLIGATED to have the swagger (and certainly some do regard humility as a virtue), but if you want to have it, we mere mortals really shouldn't begrudge it to you.
   
  And that's where Kurt lost me last week. Because he went beyond saying "I'm gonna have the best matches of my career and blah blah blah" to saying things that seemed flat-out demonstrably false. To me, that's where you stop being Barry Bonds, and start being a self-involved buffoon of a drama queen. You know, like Terrell Owens. Who wouldn't be worth the trouble even if he was gonna run off four League MVP wins. Which he isn't. Because he's not that good. He's not even among the top five at his position in the league. 
   
  But I digress. Angle's questionable comments run the gamut from relatively minor/mundane issues to fairly significant ones. Like: he shat upon his old WWE entrance as ineffective and uncreative because all they did was give him The Patriot's old music. Nevermind that it was also one of the Fed's top memorable/crowd-participation entrances of the past several years, I guess.  Then he said that TNA listened to him, and as a result his new entrance was the Best In The Business. Which, objectively speaking, is hilarious. It's TNA's standard laser beams and shitty public domain music, WITH AN ELEVATOR~! It's not even one of TNA's top 3 impactful entrances.
   
  Which is a minor/petty point, but it speaks to how Kurt has crossed a line where you pretty much have to take the words coming out of his mouth with as much suspicion and as many grains of salt as you would The Devil Himself, Vince McMahon. The tales Angle tells of his departure from the company cast Vince as evil incarnate, and himself as a noble angelic figure. Then again, Angle's tales about his departure, his dispute with the company over which of them wanted him on the road and which of them wanted him to stay home, and his drug use are all a ludicrously tangled mess of statements that not only contradict other widely-believed reports, but which sometimes contradict themselves. That doesn't speak well to Angle's credibility, either.
   
  In fact, I think pretty much the only constant in Angle's story about leaving WWE over the past 2 months is that it involved a cup of coffee. And he thinks it's funny to play coy over exactly what he did with it.
   
  Kinda reminds me of how nobody was really able to agree who was the good guy or the bad guy in the whole Montreal Screwjob mess, but Bret made damned sure that everybody knew he didn't leave the arena that night without punching Vince in the face.
   
  But let's not go there. I've been trying to be more creative than the masses who are all wanting to compare Angle to Bret. Or at least: been trying not to just parrot those relatively obvious comparisons. I kinda do like my Bonds Analogy...
   
  Though it does raise the issue: why is Bonds so universally vilified, while Angle remains extremely popular with almost all fans to this day?
   
  I think it comes down to one simple thing: wrestling fans, unlike baseball fans, enjoy being fooled. It's at the core of our fandom to find that one character who makes us stand up and cheer, that one angle or promo that makes us want to see the payoff match, and that one moment in that match where were stop caring and we BELIEVE and we don't know who's gonna win. Maybe Bonds duped us, and if so, he ruined some perceived Purity Of The Game. 
   
  But if Angle wants to dupe us with stories of his own remarkable health, the evil of Vince McMahon, and countless other fairy tales, TELL US MORE KURT~! We want to believe that not only is everything alright, but that it's going to be even better now that you're in the ultra-magxurious confines of TNA.
   
  I'll stop short of making the hacky observation that we might be even more prone to wanting to believe Kurt's stories given a certain looming One Year Anniversary... but if there are people out there who are honestly believing Angle's side of the story (despite, for the first time in documented history, WWE's side seeming to fit the facts a lot better), there's gotta be some pretty powerful mojo playing with our heads.
   
  And I'll also stop short of any real doomsaying, but I will admit that I wish if Russo has the TNA job, then he'd at least have made himself useful by booking an OMG SHOOT~! angle at the PPV where Kurt would have suffered a blow to the neck early in the show from Samoa Joe, and then seen his condition slowly degrade throughout the main event until he collapsed in the ring (HBK 1995-style). A "rushed" finish to the match and an awkward sign-off later, and "OMG, TNA killed Kurt, those BASTARDS!" would have been the talk of the internet for a week or so until people finally sorted the facts out.  Then, for MY edification, TNA would have introduced the concept of Kurt's frail health to the casual viewer at home and delayed the inevitable match with Joe until Spring 2007, when it can be had safely, and without me having all the reasons why WWE was so willing to cut Kurt loose swirling around in the back of my mind as I worry about his well being.
   
  Enough Kurt Angle talk for you? It is for me.
   
  
• WWE's made some personnel moves the past 2 weeks. Nothing too major, but worth mentioning:
   
  Probably the most frustrating one is that they cut Shooter Albright ("Gunner Scott" during a brief run on SD!). They brought him up to SD! with the intent of doing a storyline with Benoit, but then Benoit left to get healthy, and he was left with nothing to do but head back to OVW. So now that Benoit's back? They fire the guy. Baffling. The guy doesn't have the charisma to project out as a main eventer, but he's so rock solid that if you surround him with even partially-strong characters, his ring work will eventually speak for itself. The angle with Benoit was a no brainer, and you can take my word for it that if they'd done Albright/Kennedy (which I was setting up last winter in some Fantasy Booking, if tiy recall), it would have ruled.
   
  Kid Kash is gone. Attitude problems, but none that completely burned his bridge, so he might be brought back after a cooling down. 
   
  Psicosis is gone. Because he committed Grand Theft Auto (the felony, not the videogame) in Mexico. He was already in bad graces because of the time he was talking off to deal with family matters, and this sealed his fate once and for all.
   
  The Boogeyman is back. After being fired, he was rehired a week or so later, mostly on the strength of Booker T vouching for him. Boogey has rededicated himself to training for a return and is doing so at Booker's wrestling school. Booker was also instrumental in helping get Too Cold Scorpio (who'll be using the Flash Funk gimmick again; ugh) a full time gig.
   
  
• One TNA roster tidbit: both Ron Killings and Monty Brown wanted out of TNA a few months ago. With the arrival of Russo, Killings is much more comfortable and should be staying.
   
  But Monty's contract has expired, and he's not exactly in a rush to re-up. WWE has expressed interest, but Monty's successful non-wrestling ventures mean he won't be an easy sign, especially since WWE would be insane to give that load any sort of a "superstar" contract (I wouldn't insult him with a developmental deal, but I wouldn't start him at anything more than a mid-five-figures downside guarantee, either).
   
  
• Ratings catch-up....
   
  There's almost nothing interesting to report on the ratings front. On RAW, outside of the "Family Reunion" special -- which scored a 4.1 in the standard 2 hour timeslot -- RAW's weekly average hasn't deviated from a 3.6 or 3.8 in ages. That's really not good news. I mean, it ain't BAD news, either, but.... you know. [Of note: RAW did a disappointing 3.7 last week despite HEAVY hype on the tabloid media all day about Kevin Federline's appearance. K-Fed getting his ass beat might equal a Smile On My Face. But it didn't equal ratings. WWE's solution? Cart K-Fed out again tonight. Ugh.]
   
  SD! also held its ratings within a narrow range. Mostly 2.4s and 2.5s since the CW move, but last week jumped up to a 2.7 for a show that featured a semi "Free Per View" line-up with the Booker/Batista title match and the Chavo/Rey I Quit Match. Although still well short of the low-3s SD! was pulling for UPN earlier this year, SD! is doing very well by CW standards, as -- for some reason -- just about all shows on the network are underperforming versus their previous UPN/WB benchmarks. [Except for Veronica Mars, which is up VERY slightly over last season at this point. Neener neener neener.]
   
  ECW? Bleh. All 1.7s and 1.8s. Disappointing (and more on the fall-out below). The original 12 episode commitment of ECW on Sci-Fi averaged a 2.3 rating. The 7 episodes since August 28? Have averaged a 1.8 and have only gotten over 2.0 once. Wild. It's honestly like a switch was flipped. Don't know about competition in that timeslot, but you know what DID happen just before August 28? Kurt Angle got released. DUN DUN DUHHHHH!
   
  Except that Angle has no similar effect on TNA's ratings, which continue to average a 0.8, with no discernable variation or upward trend in sight.
   
  
• About ECW's ratings and the resulting philosophy changes....
   
  Some assmonkeys have gotten Vince's ear and convinced him that the reason ECW's ratings are sliding is because..... wait for it.... wait for it... the product is too different from WWE, and fans don't recognize it as a WWE brand.
   
  Oh. My. Fucking. God.
   
  For anyone to believe this makes them demonstrably retarded. For them to take this belief to Vince McMahon to convince him to further water down the ECW brand makes me want to punch a retard in the face. Which makes me a very bad, bad person. We're supposed to be more patient with the special needs kids, I know.... but COME ON.
   
  So just in case the non-stop packages hyping John Cena's shitty movie weren't enough to tip you off that this ECW was still part of the WWE Incorporated Conglomerate, expect more subtle changes to bring ECW more in line with RAW and SD! as a simple label, instead of as a "brand" that might actually have its own identity.
   
  In a way, it's liberating since it just might kill off any latent urge we have to associate this ECW with the real one (even Joey Styles, the past two weeks, seems to take relish in mentioning "the old ECW" and granting it some distinct status above and beyond "whatever this shit is"). But in another way, it's fucking annoying. Look for all standard WWE labels and production practices ("superstars," "divas," even the WWE logo replacing the ECW one in the bottom of the screen) to seep into ECW sooner rather than later.
   
  I hope I don't need to explain to you precisely why this is the opposite of the thing WWE should do if they want to stabilize/increase ratings for ECW. But even if I do, I won't. Cuz I wasted all my energy on that Kurt Angle spiel above.
   
  
• After losing an "I Quit" match to Chavo last week, Rey Mysterio had knee surgery, and because he kept making things worse by wrestling at full speed the past 3 months, he's now looking at a recovery time that could take 6 months (or right up till WrestleMania).
   
  As annoying as the story-side of things got, Rey and Chavo had some freaking great matches these past few weeks, so here's hoping Rey gets well fast and the two can be paired up for a killer blow-off at Mania next year.
   
  
• There was apparently a lot of misplaced drama about JBL leaving SD! a week or two ago.... in reality, JBL is set for life if he wanted to leave the company and focus on other pursuits (including televised ones on FOX News), but he was never really in dire danger of not re-negotiating his WWE deal. And sho 'nuff, he's once again on board, and won't be leaving the SD! desk any time soon. Which is cool with me. The guy has definitely found a niche.
   
  While people were sweating over JBL, the real uncertainty at this point is apparently over Tazz, whose contract is up within the next few months, and might be playing a brand of ball a bit harder than he should be in looking for his new contract. We'll see how it pans out, but though I'd hate to lose Tazz, I can see WWE doing something stupid here to make a statement (what the statement is, I dunno, but it's something probably about ECW not being that important, so take your lowball contract renewal and like it!). Al Snow's really good on commentary for OVW, and it's not like he couldn't fly out of Louisville for an hour of work every Tuesday night.
   
  
• John Cena's movie, The Marine, has got to be a disappointment from just about all perspectives.
   
  Critically, it was a bomb, and even among casual movie goers who were expecting "just an action movie," it was frequently mocked as an pitiable entry into the genre. Just keep in mind: when screened this past spring, the movie was HOWLINGLY bad, and the early reviews necessitated an uncommonly heavy schedule of re-shoots. So keep in mind: if you saw the film and thought it stunk, this is it stinking on its SECOND TRY.
   
  At the box office, the movie pulled in $7.5 million its opening weekend to roughly meet the low expectations. In its second weekend, it grossed only $3.5 million, however, which bodes ill for "The Marine's" chances of recouping its production and marketing costs (estimated to be in the mid-to-upper $20 millions), at least not unless there is a super strong overseas or DVD market for it.
   
  For a quick comparison, let's recall that Kane's "See No Evil" opened at $4.5 million and ALSO made $3.5 million in its second weekend, en route to a domestic gross somewhere around $12 million. Kane's film opened on half-as-many screens as Cena's did, and cost less than half-as-much money to make and to market. It also opened in the middle of the jam-packed May Summer Blockbuster Launching Pad (up directly against "The Da Vinci Code" and up against "X-Men" in its second weekend). By comparison, "The Marine" had to compete with "The Grudge 2."
   
  Distilled down: despite twice the budget, twice the promotion, twice the movie screens, and half the competition, Cena will just *barely* outperform Kane at the box office. I'm sure there's a lesson in there, but I'd be all playa hatin' if I bothered to point it out.
   
  
• In one of the most remarkable resurrections in about 2006 years, Corporal Kirschner is still alive!
   
  WWE.com reported him dead last week, of natural causes. WWE.com also reported his real name was Thomas Spears, which caught me by surprise, since I always thought the guy's name was Mike Kirschner. But whatever: WWE.com never lies, right?
   
  Well, somebody duped them on this one, because a few days later, Kirshner's mom was writing everybody she could to assure them that her son was alive and well. The Toronto Sun's "SLAM Sports" website broke the "news" in an interview with Kirschner over the weekend.
   
  WWE.com has removed the story from their site but, as far as I know, has not posted a retraction/correction, yet. Chumps.
   
  
• I think that's about all the important stuff for right now. I continue to make no concrete promises about my own personal output, other than to say that when I am motivated and able, I'll bring you the gOOdness.... but I will speak on behalf of the trOOps, as they are under orders to continue producing material for me to post on their behalf, or else.
   
  Well, except for the ECW Recap. I think that thing's up for grabs again if somebody wants to make a case for why it should be theirs.
   
  Drop me a line if interested. Otherwise, be well, enjoy your wrestling till next we speak, and may Eli Manning and Tiki Barber combine for 25 or more Fantasy Points tonight....