Emanating from the Winnipeg Arena in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada

Your announcers are Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and Jerry “the King” Lawler
  

Douglas will then have to defend that title against Razor Ramon later tonight.

Opening Match: “Make a difference” Fatu vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

This feud was ignited after HHH tried spraying cologne on Fatu.  So offended that someone was trying to improve his body odor, Fatu insisted on having this match.  I kid you not.  We begin with HHH once again trying to spray cologne on Fatu, only to have Fatu steal the cologne bottle and then attack HHH.  We’re not a minute in and Vince has already gotten in a “baaaaaaaack bodydrop” as Fatu gives one to HHH.  Fatu 10-punches HHH in the corner and then whips him out of the ring.  On the floor, Fatu continues the attack by ramming HHH’s skull into the steps.  Back inside, HHH tries to take over by ramming Fatu’s head into the turnbuckle but that has no effect.  HHH finally catches a breather as he sends a chargin Fatu into the ropes where he does a hangman.  As the referee tries to free Fatu, HHH finally takes off his jacket and shirt.  Fatu finally gets out but HHH immediately grabs him and hits him with a piledriver.  A rolling neckbreaker by HHH gets 2.  As HHH locks on a resthold, I take a moment to ponder which of these two weighs more now than they did at this time.  I mean it’s obvious how HHH has changed from his early days, but Fatu looks pretty darn svelte here in comparison to the monstrous blob he’s become.  Fatu breaks free of the hold but cannot sustain any momentum.  HHH clotheslines Fatu who does the 360 sell for it.  That gets a nearfall.  As HHH argues the count, Fatu rolls him up for 2.  HHH goes for the Pedigree but Fatu backdrops him.  HHH comes right back with a DDT, which Fatu no-sells.  Fatu now begins his comeback.  A diving headbutt from the second rope gets 2 for Fatu.  Fatu goes for the kill with a top rope splash but simply eats mat.  HHH takes advantage, hits the Pedigree and gets the pinfall, which many in the crowd seem to enjoy.  Those wacky Canucks!

Postmatch: Jerry Lawler comes over and “interviews” HHH, which consists mostly of insults about Fatu’s odor.  This is cut short however as Henry Godwinn comes out and threatens to slop the two of them.  HHH flees however before any damage is done.

Bottom Line: A surprisingly peppy match.  There was only one resthold and it was kept brief.  Fatu sold nicely which enabled HHH to look strong as he continued to stay undefeated here.  An odd choice for an opener, but one that worked nonetheless.  **

- Dok Hendrix interviews Jim Cornette and the British Bulldog about his title match tonight and also shows clips of how the Bulldog turned on Diesel.  The Bulldog goes for the extra cheap heat by calling Winnipeg a “50 degree hellhole”.  Now is that in Farenheit or Celsius?

WWF Tag Team Championship Match: The Smoking Gunns (champs) vs. Razor Ramon and the 1-2-3 Kid.

As the Gunns make their way down to the ring, Vince talks to the challengers in the back.  Razor says they’ve put their differences behind them and they’re ready for a fight.  Ramon and the Kid offer the Gunns a handshake and then pull them away to slick back their hair.  It’s amazing how Ramon does it and looks cool while the Kid looks like a complete idiot doing it.  Absolutely nothing of interest happens for the first minute or so as both teams feel each other out.  Ramon whips Bart to the ropes and the Kid pulls the top rope causing Bart to fall to the floor.  The Kid contemplates kicking Bart while he’s down but opts instead to just toss him back inside.  With Bart in trouble, The Kid gets tagged in and nails him with a flurry of kicks.  Ramon is tagged back in and hits Bart with a fallaway slam.  Then Ramon does the same move on the Kid, but it is so he can launch the Kid onto Bart.  The Kid covers but only gets 2.  Ramon and the Kid continue to make frequent tags to work over Bart.  Bart catches Ramon with his head down and throws him to the mat.  We cut to see Dean Douglas scouting Ramon from his classroom in the back.  Ramon and Bart collide mid-ring and both go down.  Both slowly get up and tag their respective partners.  Billy immediately takes it to the Kid.  The Gunns have now isolated the Kid and begin to work him over.  Bart gets the Kid up for a suplex and then Billy dropkicks him down in a unique double team move.  Although to be honest the move sounds better in text than it looked in its execution.  That gets a nearfall.  Billy misses a corner splash and now both men are down.  As the referee is admonishing Ramon, Bart comes in and pulls Billy onto the Kid.  The referee then goes to yell at Bart, so Ramon comes in and puts the Kid on top of Billy.  Then the referee counts a very long 2 count and the crowd thought that was it.  The Kid makes a tag and Ramon takes on both Gunns.  Ramon hits Billy with the Razor’s Edge and it appears to be over.  Before Ramon covers however, the Kid asks for a tag.  After waiting a few seconds, Ramon obliges.  The Kid covers, gets 2, but before 3 Billy reverses and gets a 3 count of his own.

Postmatch: An angered Kid jumps the Gunns and then takes their titles.  Ramon comes over, calms the Kid down and then hands the belts back.

BL: A very bizarre match as both teams were faces, yet both acted like heels.  Despite the strange setting, the action was very strong.  The crowd really wanted Ramon and the Kid to win.  Well, at least they wanted Ramon to win.  More dissension seeds were planted here and the fans were ready to cultivate the Kid as a heel.  *** ¼

- Dok “shill” Hendrix hawks life-size standups of Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels.  Having those is probably the only way you could have Bret and Shawn in the same room together these days.

Marty Janetty vs. Goldust

This was Goldust’s debut match.  Janetty was also just returning to the WWF at the time.  Can you imagine that meeting?  Vince tells Janetty, “OK, we want you to come back and job to Dustin Runnels who has this new character where he plays a movie buff with homosexual undertones”.  I mean, Janetty would have to be on something to agree to that…oh wait.  Goldust comes out with a very lengthy Hollywood entrance.  After taking forever to disrobe, Goldust suddenly springs into action and tries to pummel an unsuspecting Janetty.  Janetty sees him coming and dodges him.  After a back bodydrop, Janetty clotheslines Goldust to the floor.  Goldust takes too long coming back so Janetty goes out and clotheslines Goldust on the floor.  Goldust seemingly wants nothing to do with Janetty at the moment.  Finally, Goldust comes back in the ring but opts to play mind games (aka stalling) instead of wrestle.  After whipping Janetty to the ropes, Goldust leapfrogs him and then delivers a big clothesline which Janetty does the 360 sell for.  After some lame offensive maneuvers, Goldust livens things up with a reverse chinlock.  The resthold gets broken up so Goldust throws Janetty to the floor and attacks him out there.  Janetty comes back however with a snapmare on Goldust that sends him over the top rope and to the floor.  Janetty tries for a running bulldog on the floor, but Goldust shoves him off and to the post in a wicked spot.  Goldust suplexes Janeety back inside and gets a nearfall.  Someone botches a spot where Janetty was supposed to flip over Goldust but instead both men fall in the process.  Janeety misses a corner splash.  A big DDT by Goldust gets 2.  Janetty hits the Rocker Dropper and then goes up top.  Goldust moves out of the way but Janetty sees him move and lands on his feet.  Janetty hits a series of clotheslines and goes back up top.  As he comes down, he gets booted by Goldust.  I assume this was the planned spot the first time Janetty went up top.  Goldust grabs Janetty, hits him with a front suplex and ends this atrocity.

BL: What a train wreck this was.  A number of botched spots that were just ugly.  These two never were on the same page.  In addition, Goldust failed to neither showcase a decent moveset nor bring anything character-wise into the match.  A very underwhelming debut that makes me wonder how this character ever survived for so long.  ½ *

Yokozuna vs. King Mabel

This match was made by Monsoon as punishment for the two of them attacking the Undertaker and crushing his face.  This doesn’t punish them.  It punishes us, the fans.  And cruelly I might add.  This epic confrontation begins with some slapping which leads to a slugfest.  Yoko knocks Mabel to the floor and he’s UPSET!  Back inside, they slug it out again but this time Mabel knocks Yoko to the floor.  As Yoko gets back in, Mabel avalanches him in the corner.  Mabel tries for a second, but Yoko clotheslines him as he charges.  Yoko tries to follow that up with a legdrop and misses which prompts Mabel to try for an elbow, but he too fails to connect.  Mabel goes for a bulldog, but Yoko doesn’t fall, but then stumbles and falls through the ropes trying to sell the move.  That was perhaps one of the lamest things I’ve ever seen on television and that’s coming from a guy who used to frequently watch Perfect Strangers.  Mabel attacks Yoko on the floor but when he tries to post him, Yoko shoves him into the pole instead.  Meanwhile, Mo shoves down Mister Fuji and Cornette for some reason.  After shoving Mabel into the post, Yoko stumbles and actually falls on top of Cornette.  All of these shenanigans are enough to get both men counted out.  There was no way they were both out there for 10 seconds, but who cares, at least it’s over.

Postmatch: Yoko and Mabel tease going another round (please God no) but instead hug.

BL: What a wretched waste of PPV time.  When there was action it was simply punching.  The rest of the time was spent stalling and missing spots.  Then let’s not forget that this was 2 heels fighting and the match ended with a double countout.  I’ll be generous.  -**

- In a rather pointless segment Shawn Michaels comes out looking quite dejected to give the IC title to Dean Douglas.  Shawn then leaves but not before pausing in the aisle looking forlorn to give the production crew their money shot for Shawn’s upcoming music video.

- Dean Douglas stays in the ring celebrating because it’s now time for…

WWF Intercontinental Title Match: Dean Douglas (champ) vs. Razor Ramon

Ramon comes right in and immediately goes to work on Douglas.  The onslaught is too much so Douglas takes a powder on the floor.  Back inside, Ramon begins to work on Douglas’ arm.  Douglas works Ramon into a corner and gives him a cheapshot.  Ramon catches Douglas coming off the ropes and hits him with a fallaway slam.  He follows that up with a clothesline that sends Douglas over the top rope.  Ramon brings Douglas back in with a delayed suplex.  After getting whipped into the turnbuckle, Douglas again rolls to the outside.  Ramon follows after him and douses him with J.R.’s bottle of water.  Ramon hits Douglas with an atomic drop and then tries for the Razor’s Edge, but Douglas backdrops him out of the ring.  Douglas tries a high risk maneuver but Ramon catches him and then chokeslams him.  Ramon sets Douglas on the top turnbuckle but Douglas elbows him before he can do a move.  Douglas then goes for a crossbody from the top rope.  Ramon rolls through it and gets a 2 count.  Out of nowhere, Douglas springs up and hits a standing dropkick.  Douglas covers but Ramon gets his foot on the rope before the referee can count 3.  Ramon reverses a whip by Douglas and then hits him with a side suplex.  Ramon drapes an arm over Douglas and the referee counts 3 despite replays showing Douglas’ leg being clearly under the ropes.  Nonetheless the decision stands and Ramon becomes an unprecedented 4 time IC champ.

BL: Well I don’t get that finish at all.  They spend the entire match having Ramon basically squash Douglas (I’ve seen Tom Stone get more offense on Jake Roberts in a typical episode of Superstars) only to have that kind of unresolved finish?  Why not have Ramon hit the Razor’s Edge and complete the burial?  This did nothing for no one.  You can talk Clique conspiracy if you like, but the bottom line is that this was not a very good match.  * ¾

- Before the main event, Bret Hart comes out to join the commentary team.  Lawler seems ready for a fight but instead opts to flee to the back.

WWF Championship Match: Diesel (champ) vs. The British Bulldog

For note, Bret has come out to do commentary because he will fight the champion at Survivor Series.  To the match…a series of lockups give neither man an advantage.  Diesel catches the Bulldog coming off the ropes and slams him to the mat.  A second slam by Diesel forces the Bulldog to take a breather outside.  The Bulldog tries crotching Diesel from the outside but Diesel uses his legs to throw the Bulldog into the post.  Diesel now gives the Bulldog some rough turnbuckle treatment.  Cornette gets on the apron to distract Diesel and the Bulldog takes advantage.  The Bulldog dropkicks Diesel all the way to the floor and almost into the announce table.  Bret tries to prevent Diesel from falling and Diesel in return piefaces Bret.  As the two stare at each other, the Bulldog comes from behind and clips Diesel’s leg.  Inside now, the Bulldog works on Diesel’s leg.  The Bulldog gets Diesel back inside and locks on a half crab.  He then transitions to a Boston Crab, but Diesel powers out of it.  Like a cat, the Bulldog immediately springs back onto Diesel and puts his leg in a grapevine.  This lasts way too long.  While the Bulldog tries to hop on Diesel’s bad leg, Diesel is able to shove Bulldog to the outside with his good leg.  The Bulldog goes for a suplex but Diesel reverses it.  Diesel follows it up with a side suplex.  The Bulldog points to Bret and then locks on the Sharpshooter but Diesel powers out.  A failed slam attempt by the Bulldog gives Diesel a nearfall.  The Bulldog is able to get Diesel up for the running powerslam but Diesel slides off and then gives the Bulldog a big boot.  As Diesel signals for the Jackknife, Cornette gets on the apron.  Diesel hurls Cornette into the ring, then the Bulldog charges at Diesel but misses and collides with Cornette instead.  The Bulldog falls to the floor and Diesel follows after him.  Diesel tries to ram the Bulldog’s head into the post, but gets thrown into it himself instead.  The Bulldog then goes over and slaps Bret on the head.  Bret chases him and starts attacking him in the ring, which draws a DQ.

Postmatch: After the Bulldog is announced as the winner, Bret and Diesel get into a slugfest to no reaction from the crowd.

BL: Ugh, yet another lame non-finish.  And in the main event no less.  As for the match itself, I can appreciate on some level the psychology behind working on Diesel’s leg, but 50% of the entire match was the Bulldog having Diesel in a grapevine.  Yawn!  The rest of the action was nothing to write home about either.  * ¼

Final Thoughts: A completely forgettable show.  And one it seemed most people forgot to buy too as according to some reports, it got the lowest WWF pay per view buyrate ever.  This was the first time that two In Your House events were back-to-back and it hurt the value of the card.  Since they were waiting for Survivor Series for their big matchups, this show was forced to have sloppily thrown together feuds and matches that featured two faces or two heels.  No matches standout as worthy of recommendation, so I’m gonna have to give this show a big ol’ thumbs down.

Next time, everyone’s worried about surviving the Survivor Series, even the President and inanimate objects.

Until then, thanks for stopping by the OOld Tyme Rasslin Revue.