Your commentators are Jim Ross and Jerry “the King” Lawler

- I should point out the cool entranceway that looks like the gates of hell to go along with the “Highway to Hell” theme for the show.

 
We begin with the two locking up and then D’Lo giving Val a cheap shot. After another lockup, Val chops D’Lo, but injures himself on D’Lo’s chest protector. A bodyblock by D’Lo drops Val. A dropkick by Val forces D’Lo to take a time out. Back inside, they go through some criss-cross action, which ends with a spinebuster by Val. We see Edge lurking through the crowd as Val misses a big splash. D’Lo reverses a sleeper into a back suplex. Val hits a move that closely resembles a t-bone suplex, but D’Lo comes right back with a clothesline. A legdrop by D’Lo gets 2. Val tries to slam D’Lo, but can’t because his back was too hurt, which is odd since D’Lo hasn’t worked Val’s back yet in this match. D’Lo locks Val in a Texas Cloverleaf, which immediately wins points with me, but then lets go of the hold before Val submits or even reaches the ropes. When D’Lo goes for a second rope legdrop, Val moves out of the way. Val knees D’Lo in the midsection a couple of times, but doesn’t act like it hurts like he did with the chop earlier. D’Lo catches Val coming off the top rope and powerbombs him. That gets 2. A DDT gives D’Lo another nearfall. Now D’Lo comes off the top rope and Val catches him with a powerslam. Val hits D’Lo with a double arm suplex and a slam and then goes back up top. He goes for the Money Shot, but D’Lo gets his knees up. A “D’Lo” chant breaks out, which is then followed by a “D’Lo sucks” chant. Gotta love NYC. D’Lo goes to powerbomb Val, but accidentally drops him on his head. Man, good thing that never happened again. Oh wait. Then, they do the spot again with D’Lo hitting the move properly. D’Lo goes for the frog splash, but comes up empty. Val grabs D’Lo and removes his chest protector. So what’s the first move he does after removing it? A powerslam. Funny, I thought something like a gutbuster would have been more effective. Now Val has put on the chest protector and goes up top. The referee tries stopping Val from doing a move with the chest protector and in the process accidentally crotches Val. However, Val recovers quickly and goes back to work on D’Lo. The referee continues to warn Val, so Val shoves him down. The referee gets up and calls for the bell.

Postmatch: A pissed off Val slams the referee and then hits him with the Money Shot.

Bottom Line: That had to be one of the worst endings I have ever seen. You mean to tell me that in order to protect both men, which I don’t think was really necessary, that that was the best way to do it? It doesn’t help that there were already some problems with this match. There seemed to be a lot of miscommunication problems which prevented the match from having a good flow and also made for some awkward spots. There was also some psychology problems, like Val selling a back injury out of nowhere and then D’Lo having to go with it. Plus, the inconsistency of whether striking the chest protector brought harm to the opponent. Despite the matches shortcomings, the crowd was into it up until the ending. So hooray for that. * ½

- Earlier on HeAT, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin destroyed a hearse. Now Michael Cole updates us and reveals that Mankind, not the Undertaker or Kane, as speculated, was inside it. Mankind gives a shout out to the Brisco Brothers Body Shop ((813)-879-4421) and then ponders using the sledgehammer left behind by Austin, in his match later tonight. Nothing good can come from that.

- Now we’re “treated” to a performance by Insane Clown Posse, who sing the Oddities’ theme song. I never thought I would yearn for a Men on a Mission performance. Sadly, the NY crowd actually enjoys the song.

This is a 4 on 3 handicap match as Taka Michinoku turned heel and joined Kaientai in one of Vince Russo’s patented illogical and forgettable heel turns. The Oddities are comprised of the Giant Silva, Kurrgan, and Golga, who was Earthquake wearing a mask. Early on, it’s evident that this is a pure comedy match. Golga steals Yamaguichi-San’s shoe and pours a soda in it. Ha Ha! Now Kurrgan gets on his knees to fight Funaki. Hee Hee! Kurrgan and Kaientai play tug-of-war with Yamaguichi-San. Har Har! Giant Silva manhandles everyone. Hilarious! Kaientai briefly mount some offense on Golga. Not so funny. Finish comes when Giant Silva and Kaientai chokeslam all 4 guys and Golga lays on top of all of them for the 3 count. Please stop, too much hilarity.

BL: This was sooooo not necessary. However, if you’re going to have this kind of match, place it appropriately in between two big matches as a palette cleanser. The Oddities, for some strange reason, were over with the crowd and Kaientai had a lot of in-ring talent. The problem is that neither team had anyone to feud with and thus neither team ever succeeded. I’ll keep this above the negative star level because of Kaientai’s bumping skills. DUD

- Hey! It’s that up and coming, hungry tiger Shawn Michaels and he’s talking with Dok Hendrix backstage. They talk about the upcoming hair vs. hair match and Shawn says someone’s about to become very uncool, which Dok agrees. That’s funny since Dok has no business judging people’s coolness by their hair since he’s still rocking the 80’s mullet here in ’98. BTW, wouldn’t it have been more appropriate for Dok to talk to Shawn about the ladder match tonight and not this one?

Also on HeAT tonight, Jarrett and Southern Justice attacked Howard Finkel and shaved off what little hair he had remaining. So X-Pac brings out the Fink as an honorary member of D-X for the match. Jarrett attacks X-Pac from behind to begin, but X-Pac quickly regains the advantage. A pair of dropkicks by Jarrett knock X-Pac to the outside. On the floor, Jarrett picks up X-Pac and crotches him on the post. X-Pac barely gets back in before the count of 10. Now Jarrett gives X-Pac some rough turnbuckle treatment. X-Pac boots a charging Jarrett, but Jarrett comes right back with a powerslam. That gets 2. X-Pac connects with a tornado DDT and both men are down. After both men get back up, Jarrett tries putting X-Pac right back down with a sleeper. X-Pac escapes and puts the hold on Jarrett. Jarrett, however, grabs X-Pac and perches him onto the top turnbuckle. From the top, X-Pac goes for a crossbody, but comes up empty. Jarrett covers and gets a nearfall. X-Pac avoids a charging Jarrett, but then whiffs himself when he goes for a spinning heel kick. I swear there have been as many missed moves as there have been moves that have hit. Jarrett locks X-Pac in the figure four, but X-Pac manages to grab the ropes. While trying to put the hold on again, Jarrett is shoved off and into the corner. X-Pac hits Jarrett with a back suplex and again both men are down. A spinning heel kick and a Bronco Buster put X-Pac back in control. Jarrett hits with a high crossbody, but X-Pac rolls through it and gets a 2 count. X-Pac catches Jarrett going for a hurricanrana and powerbombs him. That also gets 2. X-Pac goes for another Bronco Buster, but misses. Again, X-Pac goes for the Bronco Buster and Jarrett boots him in the crotch. Man, X-Pac has taken a lot of testicular abuse in this match. The Fink gets on the apron to complain and Jarrett decks him. The distraction, however, allows X-Pac to hit Jarrett with an ugly X-Factor. That gets a very long 2 count. Southern Justice come out and try to hit X-Pac with Jarrett’s guitar. That plan doesn’t work and X-Pac is able to grab the guitar and wallop Jarrett with it. Despite guitar debris all over the mat, the referee doesn’t think anything illegal happened and scores the 3 count.

Postmatch: The Outlaws hold off Southern Justice while the Headbangers and Droz hold Jarrett as X-Pac cuts off his goldielocks. Of course, the same thing happens as with all hair vs. hair matches, the clippers don’t work, so they have to hack away with scissors.

BL: A pretty underwhelming match here. Instead of a good, fast-paced, action-filled match, we got one with a lot of rest-holds. Plus, it kinda annoyed me how, like I said, there were a lot of missed moves. Not botched moves, but moves where the opponent avoids getting hit. Things seemed to be picking up at the end, but X-Pac using the guitar for the win just wasn’t a strong enough finish. **

- We go over to Dok Hendrix, who is in the theater next to Madison Square Garden, the location of tonight’s Lion’s Den match. While plugging the match, Dok gives his bold prediction that both guys will leave the match with injuries. I’ll give the NYC crowd credit, as they did their best to drown out Dok, but sadly it wasn’t enough and we still had to hear his idiotic commentary.

- Speaking of idiots, we switch over to Michael Cole, who interviews The Rock. The Rock not only insults Cole to begin his promo, but when Cole tries to throw it back to J.R. and the King, The Rock cuts him off and does it himself. Gee, and you wonder why this guy became so popular so quickly.

Sable comes out and with the least energetic introduction ever, introduces her partner, Edge. Hmmm, Edge getting involved with a woman who was dating another wrestler…is this 1998 or 2005? The guys start out, but Edge’s quick offense forces Mero to tag out. As soon as Sable is tagged in, Jacqueline tags Mero right back. Oh geez, didn’t we do this whole spiel just a few months ago at Wrestlemania? Is Sable really that intimidating? Jacqueline trips Edge as he was coming off the ropes, which allows Mero to take over on offense. Mero goes for the TKO, but Edge escapes and DDTs him. The ladies are tagged in and Sable goes to work pounding away on Jacqueline. Then she nails Mero for good measure. Mero comes in to try and stop Sable from attacking Jacqueline, but Sable just kicks him in the groin. Sable then tries to give Mero the Sable Bomb, but Jacqueline attacks her from behind. Sable quickly recovers and hits Jacqueline with the TKO. She covers, but Mero breaks up the pin. As she argues with Mero, Jacqueline again attacks Sable from behind. Heel miscommunication leads to Jacqueline accidentally hitting Mero. Edge is tagged in and does a suicide plancha onto Mero. Wow, that was pretty cool and unexpected. Jacqueline tries attacking Edge from behind, but he places her on his knee and gives her a spanking. From the top, Edge delivers a high crossbody and gets a nearfall. Edge then connects with a top rope neckbreaker and covers, but Jacqueline puts Mero’s foot onto the bottom rope. More heel miscommunication leads to Mero hitting Jacqueline this time. Edge then rolls Mero up for 2. After hitting Edge with a Samoan drop, Mero goes up top, but Edge recovers quickly enough to crotch Mero from the top rope. Mero is whipped into Jacqueline and then falls down. She then falls down and lands into his crotch. Geez, what is it with guys getting hit in the nuts tonight? Edge hits Mero with the Downward Spiral and then splashes Sable on top of him to score the pinfall.

BL: By this point, I am sick of Sable’s “rage” and the bookers trying to put her over as some credible wrestler. Sadly, all of that takes up most of this match. However, there was one bright spot; the PPV debut of Edge. In the limited time he got to fight, he displayed some good moves and showed a lot of promise. His presence improved the quality of the match, but it wasn’t enough to give it a great rating. **

- I’m watching the original PPV broadcast of this show and we now have this guy from Home Shopping Network shilling the WWF special that will air on HSN for an hour after the PPV. Hey, is that Earl Hebner in the background taking t-shirts?

- Dok interviews the Undertaker, who says that he’s going to fight Austin all by himself tonight. Taker then asks Austin, “Are you ready for me alone, boy?” I’m sure he asks that same question to all the newcomers back in the lockerroom.

- Since Taker says Kane won’t be here tonight, Cole asks Mankind what he’s going to do about his tag title defense without a partner. Mankind begins to ramble and go into hysterics. He’s just about ready to go play in traffic when the master manipulator himself, Mr. McMahon appears and convinces Mankind that if he goes out there and wins all by himself, he would be immortalized in Madison Square Garden History. This little promo was a great example of two guys, fully in tune with their characters playing off of each other very well.

The Lion’s Den, if you’ve never seen it, is a conical shaped structure made of fencing and steal. It’s as close to the Octagon without infringing on any copyright issues. Shamrock begins by immediately ramming Owen into the fencing. Now Owen returns the favor. Owen whips Shamrock into the fence, but Shamrock comes right back with a clothesline. Shamrock rips Owen’s shirt off and begins to choke him with it. A nice move by Shamrock, as he springboards himself off the fence and crashes into Owen. Owen sidesteps a charging Shamrock and throws him into the fence. Shamrock is now on the receiving end of some rough fence treatment. Owen is in firm control with an enziguri and a backbreaker. A loud “nugget” chant breaks out. Ha Ha Ha…nugget. Owen goes for a piledriver, but Shamrock reverses it into a back bodydrop. Shamrock powers out of a Sharpshooter attempt, however, Owen comes right back with a knee to the groin. A hurricanrana attempt is blocked by Shamrock, who powerbombs Owen to the mat. Shamrock tries another springboard move, but Owen catches him with a powerslam. Owen locks in the Sharpshooter, but Shamrock pulls himself up the wall of the fence to break free. After whipping Shamrock into the fence, Owen puts him in a dragon sleeper. Shamrock, is able to escape by walking up the fence and flipping over Owen. Shamrock then places Owen in the ankle lock and Owen has no choice but to tap out.

BL: They certainly made the most out of nothing. The Lion’s Den structure certainly doesn’t lend itself to a lot of creative spots, yet these two were still able to do some brutal looking stuff to each other. I think it would have been neat to see some more chain wrestling, but that just wasn’t going to happen at this point in the WWF. If they were going to do this type of match, Owen was a good choice as an opponent to have it come off looking good. ***

- Austin talks to Cole about his upcoming match while displaying his new Smoking Skull title. Call me a hypocrite if you like, but I will go on record as saying the Smoking Skull belt was very cool, while John Cena’s blinged-out spinner belt simply…is not.

As stated before, Kane is supposedly not here, so this is now a handicap match. Also, this is a no holds barred, falls count anywhere match. As if all those stips weren’t enough, the Outlaws bring out a dumpster with them to begin as well. Match begins with Mankind wearing out both Outlaws with a baking pan. Mankind upgrades to a chair, but has it stolen by Road Dogg. Now the Outlaws take turns swinging cookie sheets at Mankind’s head. Mankind is able to come back by playing divide and conquer. A swinging neckbreaker on Badd Ass gives Mankind a nearfall. The Outlaws quickly regroup and go back to double-teaming Mankind. They deliver a tandem Russian legsweep that sends the back of Mankind’s head into the edge of the dumpster. Wow, that looked painful. Road Dogg sets a table up in the corner, however, it is Badd Ass who gets hiptossed through it. A tandem neckbreaker by the Outlaws gets 2. The NYC crowd begins to chant “Foley”. Now Badd Ass powerbombs Mankind through two chairs. That gets another nearfall, despite the Outlaws’ music prematurely playing. Whoops! A spike piledriver onto the tag title belt finally is enough to put Mankind away and allow the Outlaws to reclaim the tag titles.

Postmatch: The Outlaws tell Mankind that it’s time to put him in the garbage. After putting him in the dumpster and closing the lid, the lid opens back up and out pops Kane. Kane takes a sledgehammer and shoves it down into the dumpster, which we are to assume struck Mankind. Then Kane wheels the dumpster away.

BL: This was a far cry from the hardcore matches Mankind has been in, in recent months but he still tried his hardest to provide a couple cringe-worthy moments for the crowd. Ultimately though, this was nothing more than a glorified squash. While not the best match, it succeeded in 1) giving the straps back to the more established team and 2) turning Mankind into a sympathetic babyface. * ¼

Well, after last month’s crappy non-decisive finish, these two decided to up the stakes and fight in a match that would clearly show who the better man is. The Chris Warren Band is back again to play the D-X theme again. Thankfully, they weren’t asked to play the Star Spangled Banner again. After exchanging some expletives, they switch to exchanging punches. The Rock whips HHH, but he comes back and plants The Rock with a face buster. Both men attempt their finisher, but neither can connect. As The Rock goes for the ladder, HHH stops him and they brawl in the aisle. Back in the ring, HHH knocks down The Rock with a high knee. HHH goes for the ladder, but The Rock shoves him into it. Now The Rock sets the ladder against the ring and whips HHH into it. The Rock makes the first attempt at the belt, but HHH knocks him off with a double ax handle. HHH uses the ladder to work over The Rock’s midsection. The Rock thwarts HHH’s first attempt up the ladder by yanking him down. In the fall, HHH aggravates his right knee, which had been attacked by The Rock earlier tonight on HeAT. Like a shark to blood, The Rock goes right after HHH’s knee. This includes putting it in between the ladder and hitting it with a chair. The Rock bridges the ladder onto the guardrail and steps and then drops HHH, knee first, onto the ladder. Slowly scaling the ladder, The Rock almost grabs the belt, when HHH makes a desperation lunge to knock him off. HHH tosses both The Rock and the ladder outside. On the floor, The Rock hits HHH with a slingshot that sends him into the ladder. The two brawl in the aisleway, with HHH getting the better of the exchange. HHH goes for a Pedigree on the ladder, but The Rock reverses it and backdrops HHH onto it instead. Mark Henry, who accompanied The Rock to the ring, tosses him a fresh ladder to climb. As HHH tries to stop The Rock from getting the belt, Henry blocks his way. Chyna comes over and nails Henry, which allows HHH to run in and knock down the ladder. Realistically, The Rock should have easily gotten the title there. HHH does a baseball slide, which sends the ladder into The Rock’s face. We see The Rock has been busted open from that shot. HHH goes for the belt, but The Rock manages to knock him down. The Rock plants HHH with a DDT and both men are down. Both men begin to climb. The Rock knocks HHH off and he lands onto the original ladder, but then HHH falls backward, which dumps The Rock off as well. Crowd appreciates that spot. The Rock tries attacking HHH with the ladder, but HHH blasts him with a chair and then hits him repetitively as he was pinned under the ladder. HHH is slammed onto the ladder and then The Rock delivers the People’s Elbow, which the crowd pops huge for. HHH begins to climb again, but The Rock grabs his leg. He’s able to shove him off, but when he tries to attack him from the ladder, HHH is hit with the Rock Bottom. A big “Rocky” chant for that. Now The Rock begins to climb, but HHH grabs him by the trunks and yanks him down, giving us in the process the patented Shawn Michaels’ moonshot. Gee, if anyone was going to do an homage to Shawn, I figured it would have been HHH. HHH grabs The Rock and connects with the Pedigree. Now the crowd chants “Triple H”. Awesome! As HHH gets up, Henry throws powder in his face. HHH still manages to climb up, but The Rock begins to go up the other side. The Rock knocks HHH down a few rungs and almost has the belt when Chyna comes in and gives him a low blow. HHH is now able to scale the ladder and grab the gold for the victory.

Postmatch: All of D-X come out to celebrate as they should since they were all victors tonight.

BL: A very good match, easily the best of the night, but still a notch or two below the two between Shawn and Razor Ramon. There were a couple of things that kept it from being great: 1) There shouldn’t have been any outside interference. It kinda cheapened the victory. 2) Some of The Rock’s early attempts at the belt were ludicrous as he should have been able to easily grab it and looked foolish by stalling. He either needed to not make so many attempts early on or else do a better job making us believe he needed that much time to climb. There were still some decent spots and they told a pretty good story, so good job in that regard. Finally, you gotta love when a crowd embraces both guys like that. It really made for a great atmosphere and paved the way for The Rock’s face turn. ****

- We must be short on time because we don’t even get a video package for the main event, we just go right into…

Austin starts off slugging away on Taker in the corner, but Taker turns around quickly. It’s obvious early on that both men are equally matched. A bit of miscommunication, as Taker puts his head down and Austin kicks him, but then Austin falls down as if Taker was supposed to hit him. How odd. Taker catches Austin coming off the ropes and drops him across the top rope. Austin begins to work over Taker’s leg by ramming it into the post. However, Taker comes right back with a big clothesline. Taker tries for the ropewalk, but Austin pulls him off. Austin goes back to work on Taker’s leg as we see Kane walk down to ringside. Taker spots him and tells him to leave because he wants it one-on-one. Kane obliges as Austin and Taker go back to slugging it out. From the apron, Taker chokeslams Austin into the middle of the ring. Austin comes back, however, and clotheslines Taker to the floor. The two brawl down the aisle and into the crowd. Amongst the fans, Taker backdrops Austin. Back inside, Austin goes for the Stunner, but Taker escapes it and bails to the outside. Taker grabs Austin as he was coming off the apron and rams his back into the post. After setting Austin onto the Spanish announcers’ table, Taker climbs up top and delivers a legdrop. Very impressive, but would have been cooler had the table actually broke instead of both guys sliding off of it. Taker takes Austin back in and covers, but Austin somehow kicks out at 2. Austin keeps trying to fight back, but Taker remains in control. A double clothesline knocks both men down. Austin is back up and connects with the Lou Thesz Press and F U elbow. Taker whips Austin to the corner and then follows him in. Both men collide and fall down. A chokeslam by Taker appears to signal the end. Taker goes for the Tombstone, but Austin escapes only to have his attempt at a Stunner be blocked. A second attempt at the ropewalk also fails, as this time Austin gives him a low blow as he was coming down. Taker gets up, only to be hit with a Stunner. Austin covers and scores the 3 count.

Postmatch: Taker grabs the belt and teases hitting Austin with it, but eventually just hands it to him. Then Kane comes out and he and Taker stare at Austin from the aisle as he celebrates.

BL: This wasn’t a bad match, but you just felt like there was something off about it. For whatever reason, Austin seemed to be off his game. What resulted was a lot of moves that were not crisply executed and a generally slower pace than what you would expect. On top of that, the crowd was somewhat lackluster as they weren’t given any breather after the ladder match. Chalk this up as a disappointing outing. ** ¾

Final Thoughts: It’s a fun show in that all the faces went over sans one (and he lost on a DQ). However, most of the matches failed to live up to their potential. The only one to provide some lasting, memorable moments was the ladder match. Not a bad show, but one I can’t strongly recommend. A strong thumbs in the middle.

Next time…what’s better than one triple threat match? I hope you said “two triple threat matches”, because if you didn’t, you may not like this show.