by Scotty Szanto-Nicodemus 
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

I haven’t forgotten how to do this, but I will admit that I am watching more poker than I am wrasslin’ these days.  I have played cards all of my life, but I never knew that it made for such exciting television!  It started when I first saw Celebrity Poker, but I have now moved on to a whole new set of celebrities, including Doyle Brunson and Phil Ivey.  Amey is trying to get me to come around to Celebrity Blackjack, and Coolio won the last episode, so maybe there will be something to this one.  As much as I would love to ramble endlessly (and incoherently) about my gambling habits, I reckon I should go ahead and get on with the wrasslin’ talk.  There’s an historic pay per view coming up this weekend, and I’m going to be there…with my ass planted firmly on the couch!

The card seems to be established, although since there is another Impact episode to go, there could be another match or segment added.  For now though, here are my picks for TNA’s first Sunday night ppv.

America’s Most Wanted (Chris Harris & James Storm) v. Triple X (Christopher Daniels & Elix Skipper): Last Team Standing Match – This is the main match that I am tuning-in to watch, and also the main feud that I like to watch on Fridays.  It kinda feels like they rushed through the storyline, but regardless of how we got here, we’re at the finish line now, and this should be the match o’ the night.  These are the two most successful teams in TNA, and all four men are multi-time tag champs.  This is the feud that carried the company through the last few Wednesday shows, as first Harris teamed with Skipper and won the belts, and then they lost them to their own partners when Storm and Daniels were forced to team-up against them.  The belts are no longer a part of the equation, and with the “Last Team Standing” stipulation, my guess is that the feud only has another match or two left in it!  One more thing, I think that Christopher Daniels is a wrasslin’ diety, and his fingerprints have been all over the matches in this series…so look for some innovative booking in this match in particular.  My pick: AMW…I gotta go with the fan-favorites, and TNA’s first best “homegrown” talent.

Raven v. Monty Brown v. Abyss: Monster’s Ball – I have no idea what the “Monster’s Ball” gimmick is supposed to do with anything, other than hanging-over from Halloween, and giving them an excuse for a No DQ match for Raven.  I wouldn’t look for too much of the old-school Raven in this match, as he is really just there to provide a stepping-stone for one of the other two guys.  Two very contrasting guys in Abyss and Monty Brown…many will call Abyss a Kane rip-off, and they wouldn’t be far off the mark with that statement.  However, Abyss has really connected with the fans, and has a strong grass-roots fanbase.  Monty Brown, on the other hand, has finally found the gimmick that will get him pushed, and he is “The Alpha Male”.  I really don’t get his popularity, but then I put a lot of weight on in-ring ability, and Monty Brown is…well, he’s an ex-football player.  My pick: Monty Brown…as much as it pains me, I think that TNA will be pushing their newest homegrown talent to the main event of the next ppv.

Jeff Hardy v. Jeff Jarrett (champ): Ladder Match for the NWA World Heavyweight Championship – This is the return match from the last Wednesday night show, a match won by Jarrett, of course.  The two wild cards are Hall and Nash, both of whom have cut promos declaring that they will “have Jeff’s back.”  Hall is in Jarrett’s corner, and Nash in Hardy’s, but I want to point out that Hall was instrumental in eliminating Jarrett from the first Gauntlet for the Gold on TNA’s first ppv…and they’ve been including that footage in the commercials for this show.  Regardless, I don’t see Hardy as championship material (and besides, they need a heel for the new #1 contender), and he will leave Planet Jarrett empty handed.  My pick: Jarrett retains in order to set-up the classic confrontation between himself and Monty Brown.

There’s also:

Dusty Rhodes v. Vince Russo: Election to determine a new Director of Authority for TNA – The polls open at 12:01 et Sunday, and will remain open (presumably) through the beginning of the ppv.  We all know that Russo is leaving, so the fix is in…but I will say that after Russo’s promo last week, I am firmly behind his character.  My pick: Dusty Rhodes.

AJ Styles v. Petey Williams (champ): X-Division Title Match – I realize that a lot of people are writing Williams off as just a glorified jobber for Styles in this match, but I have to rise up to defy that line of thinking.  Monty Brown and Abyss can carry the main events for only so long, and eventually the fans are going to demand Styles rise to the top of the card again.  Williams is a fresh talent with a killer finishing move, and has so far done a great job as champ.  My pick: Petey Williams retains in the second-best match of the night.

20-Man X-Division Gauntlet: #1 Contender’s Match – The announced entrants include The Amazing Red, Kazarian & Michael Shane, D-Ray 3000, Mikey Batts & Jerrelle Clark, LA Park, Psicosis, Sonjay Dutt, Sharkboy, Chris Sabin, and Hector Garza.  Also, Alex Shelley is probably going to be involved…he was in the Mini-Gauntlet last Friday, even though he is not listed above.  Oh, and Chris Sabin won that match on Friday, and so he will be the last to enter in this match.  It’s practically impossible to call a match like this with so many different factors…for instance, Psicosis may have signed a short-term deal to appear on two months worth of shows, in which case I would choose him to win.  There’s also a great deal of homegrown talent in this match, and it could easily go to Kazarian, Batts, Clark, Dutt or Sabin, but…My pick: Michael Shane is long overdue to feud with his partner Kazarian, and so lining one of them up as #1 contender should kick-start that story.

3 Live Krew (BG James & Konnan) v. Team Canada (Eric Young & Bobby Rude): NWA Tag Team Title Match – I’ll admit that I was disappointed when Team Canada won the belts, because I thought that it added such intrigue to the AMW v. XXX storyline, but I’ve had a few weeks to mull-over that, and those guys don’t need the belts involved in their feud anyway.  The belts are definitely benefiting Team Canada, but there has to be a title that changes hands on this show, and so I’m picking it to be this one.  My pick: 3 Live Krew win the belts, and begin what will hopefully be a brief reign as champs.

There’s also going to be the segment that they’re not allowed to call Piper’s Pit, and the Hot Rod promises a super-secret surprise guest.  My pick: last Friday Monty Brown called-out somebody from the Best Damn Sports Show Period, and so I think that person will be Piper’s guest.

That’s it folks, the entire announced card as of last week…plus there will be a midget match, but we don’t yet know the combatants, so it’s impossible to call.  Anyway, there’s a lot to attract people to this show…a little bit of everything, in order to attract a wide range of fans.  Lots of technical proficiency for guys like me, and then silliness with Dusty and Russo for the kids.  I’ll try and have my recap ready for Rick Monday morning, and I’ll see y’all then!

PEACE

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