TV PG V cc entertainment open
 

"Mr. Regal, ten days ago on SmackDown!, you were involved in a tag team match against the Mexicools with your partner, Scotty 2 Hotty. 

WWE Rewind, sponsored by Wrangler: Benoit and OJ have a discussion. I liked it much better when Benoit just punched him.

Nunzio (175 pounds, w/Big Vito, champion) vs Chance Thompson (205 pounds, already in the ring) for the WWE Cruiserweight Championship - sure looks like Vito's here to wrestle. Chance gets the title chance because...uh, maybe Nunzio will explain.
"Whoa, Paisan. C'mon over here kid. Paisan. How you feelin', you feeling' alright?"
"I'm feeling good, how about you?"
"Tonight's a big night for you, you know why?
"Why?" [apparently Chance is a MORON]
"Well, think about it, you're getting a shot at the Cruiserweight Championship of the world. Now that's big, right? Probably the biggest thing that's ever happened in your life, I would think. But let me ask you a question. YOu think you got what it takes to go toe to toe with the Cruiserweight champion of the world?"
"[nods] Yea."
"Oh, you do - Vito, he does, he does. That's pretty good. I like your passion. But unfortunately for you, before you get a shot at the champion, which is me of course, you're going to have to get pass Big Vito first. Yea, I think so. Big Vito, [Italian?]"
Apparently Nunzio has the power to make this match and Chance is willing to go along with it, because Korderas signals for the bell.

Big Vito vs Chance Thompson - Vito charges, Chances moves, Vito hits the corner. Chance with left and right jabs. Big windup punch doesn't knock Vito down, but a dropkick does. Announcers are questioning/making fun of Nunzio's GM power here, so maybe we can pretend it means something. Vito retreats to the corner, Chance charges in, and Vito decks him. Forearms to the back. Stomps. Announcers explain they're using the Cruiserweight Title to get over Big Vito (though not quite in those words), which is wrong on so many levels. Vito pounding Chance's arm into the corner many times. Chance gets thrown shoulder first into the post. Vito working over the shoulder with forearms. Did Josh just call Romero "sweetheart"?!?! Back suplex. Vito off the ropes, running elbow drop. Josh says it's the Staten Island Express. Punches to the head. Slam for Chance. Vito going to the top rope for a double jump pump splash for no reason, and he hurt his wrist in the process? Vito still in control, forearming Chance's left arm, stomping the left arm, you get the idea. Armwringer. Armbar. The idea here is he's softening Chance up for the Arrivederci, I guess, because I'm not sure how arm work helps a DDT. Chance trying to draw from the crowd but the crowd could care less. Chance rallying up. Right, right, knee, back to the punches, don't look as good as last time. Whip, reversed, Vito puts head dean too soon and gets kicked. Chance off the ropes, sorta into a thrust kick from Vito. Vito says that's it. There's the "Impaler DDT". One two three. (4:01) Crowd cheers because it's over. Nunzio's got the mic again. "Paisan, [to Vito], stay right there, you did a hell of a job. [To Chance] Oh, you alright? You alright? Paisan? Vito, pick him up, pick him up. But you know, let me look at first [to Korderas] no no no no, I just want to let him know, I just want him to let him know that he did a really good job. [To Chance, being held by Vito and dead on his feet] And just to prove what a good guy I am, I'm gonna give you a shot at the Cruiserweight Championship next week. That's the kinda guy I am. I'm a paisan, I'm a true Italian. Wait, a matter of fact [kick to Chance] why wait till next week?"

Nunzio vs Chance Thompson for the Cruiserweight Championship - No opening bell, but we'll call it from Nunzio hitting Chance square in the face with a dropkick. Knee on his neck to cover, demanding a count, one two three. (:07) Korderas does make them ring the bell again, so I guess it's a real match - though Josh is not sure.

Tonight: Hardcore Holly vs Steven Richards! Just in case you weren't bummed out from seeing it last week!

SummerSlam: "Remedy" by Seether

Rey and Eddie (3:24)
SummerSlam: Eddie Guerrero vs Rey Mysterio in a ladder match for Dominick
SummerSlam: the Undertaker vs Randy Orton
SummerSlam: Orlando Jordan vs Chris Benoit for the United States Championship
SummerSlam: Batista vs JBL in a No Holds Barred match for the World Heavyweight Championship
SummerSlam: John Cena vs Chris Jericho for the WWF Championship
SummerSlam: Eugene vs Kurt Angle in a no time limit match
SummerSlam: Edge vs Matt Hardy
SummerSlam: Hulk Hogan vs Shawn Michaels

SmackDown! Live
08/21 - MCI Center, Washington, DC [SummerSlam]
08/22 - Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, VA [SD! Live]
08/23 - Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, NC [SD!]
08/27 - RBC Center, Raleigh, NC [SD! Live]
08/28 - Florence Civic Center, Florence, SC [SD! Live]

Ken Kennedy (Green Bay, Wisconsin, 242 pounds) vs George Terces (219 pounds, already in the ring) - well someone needs to explain something here, because Ken said his last name was something else last week. He seems upset about the announcement, despite his KK trunks. Yea, he wants the microphone from Chimel.
"Whoa whoa whoa WHOA! Let me ask you a serious question, okay? What the hell is wrong with you? [sticks microphone in Chimel's face] Answer me? [sticks microphone in Chimel's face] What's wrong with you, that's not how you do that man, man you got a put a little bass in your voice! Say it like you mean it, man! Let me show you, how this is done. [ring announcing] Ladies and Gentlemen, this next contest is scheduled for ONE FALL! with a twenty minute time limit. Standing in the ring to my right, he weighs tonight in a 365 3/4 pounds, GEORGE! [pause] And now, ladies and gentlemen, without ay further ado, I weigh in tonight at 242 pounds, from Green Bay, Wisconsin [BOOO] MISTER KENNEDY! KEN NE DY!"
Well that explains nothing, except Ken loves time limits. Your ref is Charles Robinson, if that's still his name. Lockup, no, Ken's kicking George down. Forearms. Knee to the midsection, knee to the midsection. Slapping around George. Whip, kneelift. One two no. George tries to punch his way back, but gets a knee. Ken runs him into the corer. Romero: "I was cool in 1987." Doubtful. Kickdown in the corner. Boot scrape. Foot to the face. Off the ropes, running boot to the face. One two NO. One two NO. KNEE! Abdominal stretch. Too far from the ropes to do something, so Ken just cranks it. Romero: "I'm too good looking." George tries to elbow out, but Ken ducks a clothesline and drops him with him. Bodyscissors submission. George trying to break free with elbows, and does. Chops. Whip, reversed, Ken misses a clothesline, kinda hits on a cross body. Was Ken supposed to catch him? Ken doesn't really sell the impact and gets a waistlock, before giving George forearms to the back. Side backbreaker, holding on, lifting George up, and dropping him with the Fit Finlay slam. One two three. (3:09) You might not believe this, but Ken doesn't like the winning announcement. "And the winner of the match, MISTER KENNEDY! KENNEDY!" Just to be weird, they'll do the ads after the match.

Your announcers are Steve and Josh, and they talk about SmackDown!'s main event.
Benoit vs Orton (3:10)
SummerSlam: Undertaker vs Orton
Up Next: Hardcore Holly vs Steven Richards. Same thing.

Bod Bodyslam of the Week: Batista stops JBL.

"the Alabama Slama" Hardcore Holly (Mobile, Alabama, 242 pounds) vs Steven Richards (Philadelphia, PA, 220 pounds) - He's back to his Heat gear. This is gonna SUCK. Your ref is Brian. Steven yells at Hardcore. "THIS IS MY SHOW." Hardcore punches him for that? That's harsh. I'll tell you if Stevie gets to do anything neat. This is a fairly long match, because they've left these two plenty of time. Steve stops the chops once, slams Bob, and stands a round a bunch. Another slam. More standing. Waiting for Bob to turn a round - A THIRD SLAM! This man can't be stopped. Steven mocks the Alabama Slam motion. Front slam! Steven is the true master of the slam! One two no. Bearhug, I'm bored now. Hardcore punches out of it. Holly off the ropes, Steve powerslam! Only two. Working over the back. Going to the chops, and Hardcore fires back. Hardcore rallies back with chops and Steven has to eye poke him to stop it. Working on the back. Posing. Back to the chop battle. Hardcore gets a near fall on the dropkick, then tries to reverse a whip to the Alabama Slam, but his back hurts. Steven goes up, because he's a moron, and gets crotched. Holly has no problem picking Steven up into the Alabama Slam set up in that position, but Steven holds the ropes as Holly moves across the ring, trying to break him free for the move and occasionally dipping down with back pain. Still, for all the back pain, he keeps Steven up for about twenty seconds before Steven finally looses his grip on the ropes. Hardcore crawls on top one two three. (7:04) Hardcore really needs to just shave his head at this point. It's not looking good.

That's it.