by The Cubs Fan
OnlineOnslaught.com/SlashWrestling.com

One Year Ago, Albert beats Hugh Morrus, Chuck Palumbo and Sean O'Haire have to cheat to beat the Hollys, and Lance makes Scotty tap. In WWF New York, Tajiri and Regal hung around a bunch but didn't do anything intersting.

TV14 DLV Entertainment Open no fireworks - look at the people trying to get in the building. Fans have been lined up since early this morning - wow, that line must be slower than it even looks. Look at all those empty seats - and look at your hosts: D'Lo and Coach. D'Lo says SummerSlam has a WrestleMania feel. Let's not waste any time - right to the package. YOU CAN'T WRESTLE ANYMORE. "The blood of you" doesn't seem grammatically correct. (1:50) Everyone's so excited for SummerSlam, they've got paramedics backstage in preparation for heart attacks! Maybe.

At the World - "Mr. and Mrs. Class" Jamie Noble and Nidia. Nidia: "Hey! It's - It's SummerSlam tonight! You got Brock Lesnar vs the Rock, you got Triple H vs Shawn Michaels, but here at The World we're gonna show you guys a show! Because New York has never seen the likes of Jamie Noble and Nidia!" "What do you think baby? There's a lot of good looking fellas out here in New York City, ain't there? I've seen you looking, I've seen you eyeballing. You think my Nidia is pretty? You got that right! She's the prettiest thing every to walk the streets of New York City! We've been talking all this week, we're just coming up with something special we can do at the World, and tonight right here in New York City, she's going to pick out some lucky guy to make out with right here - LIVE on SummerSlam! Yea, you like that, don't you?" "I can pick anyone?" "Anyone you want, baby? Tonight's your night!" "Oh baby, I love you!" CALL YOUR PPV PROVIDER RIGHT NOW! 

D'Lo and Coach talk about that - and hype seeing those training vignettes one more time. Still to come - Spike Dudley vs Steven Richards. 

Well that explains why D'Lo didn't look dressed to wrestle - only the International Heat viewers get to see the blowoff to the feud. See the thing about B-Show feuds is that they only exist because someone's not paying attention - if you do, you're bound to get let down. Sad truth.

Back on Heat, and Nassau will be filled for tonight's PPV. Somehow, we segue into being proud to being American - and those who aren't a big fan of it. Hey, new video package. Look at all these great images of America and hear Lillian (one last time?) and then get the opposition view. (1:22) They've got two matches tonight. You can't get more patriotic than Goldust and Booker T. Also, Undertaker vs Test.

Moments ago, Undertaker rode on it.

Tomorrow, it's the Pledge to Participate Tour kickoff - Federal Hall - Wall St. New York City. The Coach will be there, so you've got to go.

Look at the people still lined up outside. Are they gonna get in the building in time? Well, these ads will sooth your mind. There seems to be less people then we saw earlier. 

Your main event is a match you've never seen before - no one can wait. What does it take to get there? (2:18) Later, the Rock's preparation. Talk about RVD/Benoit. Angle/Mysterio could steal the show - let's see that video package. (1:41) 

Backstage, Everyone Hates Marc Loyd talks to Kurt Angle: "Let me ask you a question, Marc Loyd: Would you like it if someone interfered when you were trying to do your job?" "No." "Well, let's say you were doing an interview like this one, and a guy like Coach walks up and punches you in the face. Would you like that?" "No!" "I didn't think so. And let's say you politely asked him not to do it again. And while you were doing play by play for Velocity, Coach walked down and kneed you in the groin. Would you like that?" "No, probably not." "Of course not, that would hurt. But for the past few weeks, your Olympic hero has trying to do his job. Which is breaking people's ankles, and making people tap. But it's kinda hard when you've got a freaking 12 year old like Rey Mysterio flying around, sticking that mask of his in my business. Well, Rey Mysterio will no longer get involved in my business, because tonight, Rey Mysterio is my business. and I'm not gonna stop till he's tapping on the mat, screaming for mercy. It's true, Ay Caramba, it's damn true!" 

D'Lo and Coach talk about Angle's focus. A little bit on HHH/HBK - that's coming later. Let's get back to Rock/Brock a bit - here's a message to remind us that we have to buy the PPV to see it.

NEXT! The Rock training vignette you've already seen! If that doesn't get people to stick around, I don't know what does.

Lugz Trish Mud Dive of Monday

Backstage, a limo arrives. Inside, it's - Eric Bischoff. Terri meets him. "You know, this is your very first SummerSlam and I'm curious how- how you're feeling about tonight." "I feel excited, I think everyone's excited. I mean, each one of the WWE pay per views has their own legacy, their own personality, their own history. But when I think of this SummerSlam, I think of the RAW factor, and how much impact RAW is gonna have on the overall success of SummerSlam. I mean, think about it: you've got RVD/Chris Benoit, the IC Title. Everyone knows how important that is to me and to RAW. And then you have Triple H/Shawn Michaels - Shawn Michaels has been gone from the ring for four years. I might add that's a match up that started where? On RAW! And, you add all that up, plus everything else that's on the card, I think this is a SummerSlam that everyone's gonna remember for a long long time. I know I will! You have fun tonight." 

Coach and D'Lo miss the obvious clue that Something Is Up - and move on to hype for Rock/Brock. Here's Rock's training package. (2:46)

Foot Locker Fozzy Interrupted of Monday

Backstage, Terri catches up to Ric Flair. "Well, I'm excited to be here. First of all I'm excited to be here, SummerSlam. I've got a lot of thoughts, a lot of comments. Jericho has worn me out - he's put Ric Flair in a position where I've got to be Ric Flair again! A lot of people don't like that, but I've got to be the Nature Boy, to contend - WOO - with the King of the World. I mean, after all, Terri, he hit me with that chair - he attacked me, he hit me with that chair. I got to return the favor, right? I hit him with a chair. And then I think to myself, you know, I'm gonna do something even worse than that, I'm gonna gonna embarrass the King of the World - the first Undisputed WWE Champion! - I'm gonna embarrass him. Then he makes me bleed - leaves a hole in my head! Not the first, not the last, but leaves a whole. That last, last, last memory of me seeing Chris Jericho is blood in my face. Now I tore up that nothing happening band of his, but I'm here tonight at SummerSlam because this 16-time, kiss-stealing wheeling dealing limousine riding son of a gun WOO and you and I both know can be Space Mountain just like that - they say that I'm too old, Jericho says I'm too old - I may be the oldest ride in the park baby, but the line is still the longest! And tonight, the King of the World, why WOO the Nature Boy will ride on forever! WOO!"

That match is on PPV. Here's a graphic to prove it. And now to the "non-sanctioned" because "unsanctioned" would be grammatically correct. Let's look at a video package of this friendship from five years ago. (4:01) It's gonna be a Fight. FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.

D'Lo and Coach wrap it up and send it to the RAW team - at their new position, it's Jerry Lawler and Jim Ross.

Steven Richards vs Spike Dudley - Jim Ross calls Steven controversial - huh? I think Spike is remerging getting hit with that chair two weeks ago, but I'm not sure. I'm distracted because I can see the Spanish guys set up already, and a desk set up next to them. . Spike slides in ducks a clothesline, forearms, Steven misses a clothesline, Spike with an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline to knock him down. Whip, reversed, Spike with a spinning headscissors. Steven outside and going for one of those chairs from the empty desk, but Spike forearms before he can get to one. Whip, reversed, and Spike goes into the steps. Spike thrown in. Steven follows. Kick to the back. Suplex, chained into another, yell, chained into the front suplex one two no. Full nelson, Spike with elbows out. Lawler says Steven LIKES being called Wacko. Wacko does not like being called Steven, though. Jawbreaker. Spike going up - but Steven gets a right to stop him. Superplex? YES. But Spike hooks the leg on the way down one two NO. Wow, that would have been quick. Steven on Spike with an ax-handle and punches. Now slapping the back of the head. Yelling at him. Spike with a forearm, forearm, forearm, forearm, Spike with corner rights, but Steven powerbombs him one two NO. Steven argues the count with Chad Patten. Steven charges Spike in the corner, but Spike moves and Steven crotches himself. Dudley Dog one two three. (2:33) JR and King discuss Spike's shirt. Replay. Steven pouts in the ring. Now Spike is back in and beating him up more - and now throwing him out of the ring. Okay. Now a head into the steps. Now a head into the steps. Now standing on his chest and slapping him in the face. Facebite. Right. What's the point? It's not a heel turn because now he's slapping hands. Perhaps we had some time to kill.

One last look at how we got the main event and that's it. (2:33)

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