by Scotty Szanto-Nicodemus
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

Without further ado, please travel with me back in time a year and a half, to the beginning of last summer, to the boardwalk at Seaside, New Jersey:

JAPW Memorial Massacre
5/26/02, Seaside, NJ

The tape opens with a montage of different JAPW guys giving props to ModTrom Videos, the company that records their tv shows and sells their tapes.  If you’ve seen any of the JAPW tapes, then you are already familiar with this opening…if not, then go to their website and buy something!!

After a few moments of pimpin’ the crowd from the ring announcer, April Hunter comes to the ring to get the show kicked-off with a promo.  My guess is that she is upset at not being included in the new JAPW-Women’s promotion that the commentators have been discussing.  The crowd won’t get quiet enough for her tastes, so she tells them, “When the mic goes up, the voices go down.”  I was right, she is not happy at being passed-over by JAPW management, in favor of a Tough Enough loser, Taylor.

Ghost Shadow v. Azrael v. Quiet Storm – I think that Quiet Storm was on a TNA show or two, in tag matches probably.  Ghost Shadow is announced as hailing from The Lower East Side…and Azrael is from “South of Heaven”, which is near Parts Unknown we are told.  Storm and Shadow share a handshake, and then when Azrael falls for the handshake ploy, they double-team him and dump the rookie out onto the floor.  When Storm is sent to the outside, he just stays out there and watches as Shadow and Azrael go at it.  Shadow is firmly in control for most of the opening minutes, until Azrael connects with a kick to the back while Shadow is seated on the mat, Azrael follows that up by springing off the ropes and hitting him with a wicked Running Dropkick.  He goes for the cover, but only gets two.  Azrael goes to the top turnbuckle, and after teasing a leap onto Quiet Storm on the floor; he leaps into the ring and hits a Huricanrana that sends Shadow sliding under the bottom rope.  Storm quickly sneaks into the ring behind Azrael, and hits the Spinal Tap (dropping down from a Guerrero Special into a Neckbreaker).  1, 2, 3.  Huh.  The rookie is eliminated, just like that.

The announcers tell us that we have been waiting for almost a year to see Ghost Shadow and Quiet Storm one-on-one.  After some innovative fast-paced cruiserweight action that leads to the inevitable standoff, they shake hands again, but Shadow kicks him and climbs to the top.  Storm catches him on the top turnbuckle, and brings him off with a beautiful Super Diamond Cutter.  Of course, the announcers call it a Stunner because that is sexier.  1, 2, Shadow bridges up on his head to break the count!  Both men back up, and Shadow sends Storm into the corner, following him in with a knee to the head that has Storm on spaghetti legs.  Into the other corner, and when Storm attempts to leap over the charging Ghost Shadow he gets caught, and they awkwardly set-up for Shadow’s finisher…Storm has hold of the top rope, trying to fight-off the move, but to no avail as Shadow is able to hit the Mad Scientist (a crazy flipping Powerbomb of some sort).  1, 2, 3.  Ghost Shadow is your winner, and he continues the beat-down on Storm after the match is over because one of the tassels on his shirt came off during the match!

The Shaolin Wrecking Crue v. Lazaro & Eddie Thomas – Tony Lazaro is the JAPW Student Champion, and Explosive Eddie Thomas is also a student of the JAPW school.  Now that they have finished setting-up the ring, they are ready to wrassle!  If you have never seen the Shaolin Wrecking Crue, they are a cross between Samoans and the Bushwhackers.  No time to go any further into that description, because the students take a running leap and hit stereo Planchas on their opponents on the floor!  Lazaro actually took Magic out and then flew over the railing and into the first row of seats!  He’s back over quickly, and slides Magic into the ring.  As the match gets officially started, Thomas leaps from the apron and connects with a Frog Splash onto Suma on the floor!  Acid Drop by Lazaro as Thomas and Suma make their way into the ring.  The students are really taking it to their nearly 300 pound teachers in this match.  They go for stereo Irish Whips out of the opposite corners, but the Shaolins reverse it…Lazaro and Thomas are able to stop before colliding with one another in the middle of the ring, and when the Shaolins charge, the students duck out of the way, and the big men take each other out.  A pair of big Dropkicks, and the Wrecking Crue is down.  Thomas and Lazaro each connect with Moonsaults on Suma and Magic respectively, and each scores a two-count for his trouble.  Just when the announcers start to wonder how long the young cruisers can keep up this pace against the big men, they each get caught attempting Huricanranas, and they each end-up on the wrong end of a Powerbomb.  The Shaolins pick Thomas up, and catch him coming off the ropes with a Double Spinebuster.  Suma starts to work Lazaro over in the corner, conjuring images of the big man, Vader.  The Shaolins whip each other into Lazaro, with consecutive Big Man Splashes before they decide to finally try and put the match away.  Suma with a Powerbomb on Thomas, and Magic hits what I am told is a Tiger Driver ’91 on Lazaro.  They drag the students into opposite corners, and come off the turnbuckles with big Splashes.  1, 2, 3.  As impressive as the youngsters were at the beginning, they end-up being just another pair of victims for the Shaolin Wrecking Crue.

J Train comes to the ring, and after teasing us by hitting a double Clothesline, he falls victim to the numbers, and the Wrecking Crue hit a few more power moves before leaving J Train laying in the middle of the ring.  As far as I can tell, that segment did little more than show us J Train’s new clothing and dance moves, because from this point on, he will be going by the name Pimp Train.  We also are treated to a brief glimpse of Towel Boy before going to a clip-segment of the previous match set to some techno music.

Slyk Wagner Brown w/April Hunter v. Stryker – Stryker comes to the ring to a Rush song, which unfortunately isn’t going to do him any favors, as this event was in the middle of the “Stryker Winless Streak” gimmick…he is currently 0-4.  Slyk Wagner Brown enters to a DMX song, for whatever it’s worth.  You know, with that music and the doo rag and the sunglasses, Brown is quite an intimidating guy.  Of course, as soon as the music stops and he removes the doo rag to reveal a bleach-blond head of hair, the “Koko B. Ware” chants start almost immediately!  Stryker is trying to tap into some old-school pretty boy babyface heat, and for the most part he is successful.  Stryker gets a few moves in during the opening minute or two of the match, but after Brown takes a short sabbatical on the outside, he comes back in the ring and dominates most of the rest of the match.  He hits a Stun Gun (complete with props to Eddie Gilbert from the announcers), and then starts to choke Stryker on the middle rope.  The ref finally gets Brown off of him, and when his back is turned, April Hunter gets onto the apron and hits a Legdrop to the back of the head as Stryker was still laying across the rope.  Brown goes for the cover, but only gets two.    Hunter comes into the ring, and kicks Stryker in the head…in full view of the referee.  The announcers rightly admonish the ref for allowing the match to continue, but I think that it would be a little too old school to call for the bell after that.  Brown goes to the top and comes off with a picture perfect Moonsault, but Stryker is able to roll out of the way, and there’s nobody home.  Stryker is able to mount a brief offensive flurry, and sets Brown up for his Happy Monkey submission move (a modified Head Scissors/Surfboard hold).  Stryker is able to lock it on, but Hunter gets up onto the apron, and the ref doesn’t see Brown tap out.  That was enough for Stryker to release the hold, and when the ref finally gets back into the match both men are up.  Some back and forth action before Brown hits the Drop of Ecstasy out of nowhere and scores the pinfall.  For the record, the D. of E. is a Sit-Out Full Nelson slam, and Slyk Wagner Brown is your winner.

Taylor v. Allison Danger – Allison Danger is all Goth on us, and Taylor won the JAPW online poll asking who should’ve won Tough Enough.  We are also told that this is Taylor’s last match before heading to Japan.  Good for her.  The match starts out as a squash for Taylor to exhibit all four of the moves that she learned before getting voted off of the island, or wherever the TE competitors got voted from.  Allison bales to the outside, where it appears that some guy in the second row is smoking a big spliff, but I’m willing to give the benefit of the doubt and assume that it must be a cigarette since he’s sitting in the second row on the Jersey boardwalk in broad daylight.  Back in, where Danger slowly climbs the turnbuckles after taking Taylor down with a Suplex.  Taylor catches her up there, and brings her out with a sloppy Sit-Out Powerbomb.  April Hunter runs out and distracts both Taylor and the ref.  Danger makes her way to her feet, but Taylor has spotted her and takes her out with a Spear.  Hunter actually comes into the ring and breaks-up the pinfall attempt, but before she can attack Taylor, Pete from Tough Enough (I think they said that he was a second season reject) slides into the ring, distracting April Hunter, allowing Taylor to hit a Neckbreaker on her.  Once Hunter has been dispatched, Taylor is able to hit a Neckbreaker on her opponent, and score the 1, 2, 3.  Pete celebrates with Taylor, and we go to some replays.

Between matches, we are treated to the antics of Towel Boy, and as he climbs out of the ring, he says to the camera, “I love my work.”

SAT v. Wasted Youth v. J Lethal & Rainchild – Wasted Youth consists of Deranged and Insane Dragon, and they are announced from “The State of Confusion” and New Jersey respectively.  J Lethal and Rainchild are rookies that only debuted in JAPW shortly before this event.  TNA viewers should be familiar with the Spanish Announce Team, Joel and Jose Maximo.  After the introductions we get underway with Joel against Deranged.  We seem to be working under Lucha Libre rules, as someone new comes in the ring each time that someone slides under the ropes, until J Lethal is alone in the ring, and comes out with a Running Plancha onto the other five combatants…actually, there were only four people absorbing the impact of that move, as Insane Dragon quickly slides in the ring and hits his trademark move, the running Moonsault over the top rope to the floor!  There are surely other people out there doing that move, but Dragon is the first that I saw use it a couple of years ago, and so I’m calling it his move!  Joel and Rainchild are back in the ring first, and after a Clothesline flips Rainchild over onto his head, Joel tags-in his brother Jose.  Rainchild goes for a Huricanrana, but Jose ducks out of it and hits a German Suplex, complete with a bridge.  1, 2, no.  As Jose comes off the ropes, he eats a Superkick from Rainchild, who is the first to tag-out to someone other than his own partner, as Deranged becomes the legal man.  Both of the Maximos are sent out of the ring by Deranged, and J Lethal sneaks in behind him.  Lethal hits a standard Suplex, and holds on and rolls-through for a Northern Lights Suplex!  He holds the bridge, but only gets a two-count.  I have to admit that I’m a little surprised that we had to wait until the fifth match for the first Northern Lights.  Rainchild tags back in against Deranged, and just about the time that the announcers ponder the logic in tagging back in so soon after taking such a beating, Deranged connects with a kick to the gut, and his own version of the Mad Scientist…we are told at that point that Deranged and Ghost Shadow had quite a feud over the use of that move, so maybe I’ll see if I can track-down some of those tapes.  Back to the match, where Deranged has made the tag to Dragon, who comes off the top with a Flying Crossbody on one of the Maximos as he enters the ring.  Dragon flew nearly all the way across the ring on that one, as I was still looking at Rainchild, who had just then rolled under the ropes.  The other Maximo brother comes in the ring, and Dragon hits him with a sweet looking Spinning DDT.  Lethal in, and Dragon quickly dispatches him with a Flip Kick before the Maximos regroup and make it back into the ring.  Dragon is Monkey Flipped out of the corner by one of the brothers, and when he lands on his feet he eats a Spear from the other Maximo, who had charged out of the opposite corner.  I could never get too much of that spot.  Deranged comes into the ring, and gets on the receiving end of a Maximo Impact for his trouble.  Things have really broken down at this point, and I have no idea who the legal men are as Rainchild comes off the top with a beautiful Corkscrew 450 Splash…but whomever he was going for has rolled out of the way, and there is no water in the proverbial pool.  Deranged takes advantage of the situation and attempts a Corkscrew 450 of his own, successfully landing the move on Rainchild.  1, 2, no…J Lethal in to break-up the count.  Lethal is taken down with an Enziguiri by Insane Dragon, who leaps from the apron with a Springboard (standard) 450, but Lethal also rolls out of the way.  The camera follows the action outside the ring at this point, as Deranged leaps from the inside out with an Asai Moonsault on Lethal on the floor.  The SAT move-in for the kill on both Lethal and Deranged.  Of course, with four men gathered together on the floor, somebody is gonna fly, and that somebody is Rainchild, who comes off the opposite ropes, and Cartwheels across the ring, flying over the top rope with what the announcers call a Face-First Tiger Drop.  I’ve never heard of that move, and it looked kinda like a Moonsault.  I suspect that the announcers might have been trying to cover for Rainchild because he leaped a little bit early and nearly took his own head off on the top rope.  With everyone else out on the floor, the Maximos isolate Dragon in the corner and bring him off the top with the Spanish Fly.  1, 2, 3!  Joel and Jose shake hands with all of their opponents after winning the match with the hottest move in tag team wrasslin’ today…or so we’re told.  I don’t know about that, but the win by the Maximos gives us the opportunity to hear “Rap Superstar” by Cypress Hill again, so everybody wins! 

Homicide is back from Japan, and he is looking for Dixie on the pier.

Dixie (champ) w/Valentina v. Red – JAP Triple Crown Championship Match – Dixie comes to the ring wearing the Heavyweight Championship belt, with Valentina carrying the other two belts (Cruiserweight and TV Titles).  We are told that Dixie added the Heavyweight belt in a 3-way match against his brother Insane Dragon and Homicide.  After Homicide hit the Cop Killer on Dragon, he hit the Cop Killer on Dixie, but as luck would have it, Dixie landed on Dragon and got the fluke pinfall.  He defeated Homicide in their return match, and has also beaten Stryker.  This is his third title defense.  The match starts out all Red, until Dixie rolls outside and coaxes Red to chase him.  Dixie slides back into the ring first, and pounces on Red as the announcers ponder the fact that no matter who wins this match, the JAPW Heavyweight Champion will be less than 175 lbs.  Dixie works him over with some old school offense, culminating in a pair of suplexes, followed by a Neckbreaker.  Two-count only, and Dixie begins the climb to the top turnbuckle.  Red is up quickly, and he hits a spinning kick that sends Dixie tumbling all the way to the floor of the pier below!  Red nearly kills himself with a Flying Plancha over the top rope as he lands barely on Dixie at all, and hit his back hard on the steel guardrail.  Beyond all reason, Red is to his feet first, and he rolls Dixie in the ring and maintains control of the match.  Dixie off the ropes, and Red hits a Leg Sweep and his patented Red Star Press…I really really like that move!  Valentina is up on the apron at this point, which distracts Red briefly.  She holds her hands up in the international sign for “I wasn’t doin’ nothing,” and slowly climbs down from the apron.  After the ref and Red both turn their backs, Valentina leaps up and hits Red with a shot between the legs!  Dixie immediately hits the Roaring Elbow, the quick cover…1, 2, 3!  That was rather out of nowhere.  Valentina gets on the mic after the match, she reminds Dixie that he had signed an open contract to defend the JAPW Heavyweight Title, and then informs him that Homicide has accepted the contract, and the match will happen…right now!  Dixie grabs her, and that might have been a face turn by Valentina.  No time to ponder that, ‘cause right now we’ve got…

Dixie v. Homicide – JAPW Heavyweight Championship Match – Homicide rushes the ring, and Dixie tries to take control when he slides under the ropes, but Homicide quickly puts a stop to that with a series of Clotheslines.  Wow, this is turning into a squash for Homicide, who even busts out a Juvi Driver…much to my delight!  He managed to throw-in a Head and Arm Suplex for good measure, and Dixie is practically lifeless on the canvas.  Homicide off the ropes, but Valentina grabs his foot (so much for the face turn).  The distraction was enough for Dixie to take over, hitting a Huricanrana, followed immediately by a Spinning DDT out of the corner.  Dixie even goes so far as to lock in a Crippler Crossface, but Homicide is able to get his foot on the rope.  Homicide again takes control of the match at this point, but is not able to connect with his finishing move, the Cop Killer.  Homicide off the ropes with a Shining Wizard on Dixie!  I have seen him use that move before, but the announcers go nuts because apparently that was the first time he ever used the move in JAPW, after returning from Japan.  That was enough for him to hit the Cop Killer, and get the 1, 2, 3.  Your winner, and NEW JAPW Heavyweight Champion is Homicide!

Homicide tosses Dixie out of the ring, just as Chris Candido rushes the ring and attacks Homicide before the locker room empties and separates them.  After they clear the ring and get Homicide to the back, Candido is in the middle of the ring, and he’s got the stick!  He says that any belt in New Jersey belongs to him before the mic starts to cut out on him.  He drops the names of the other ex-ECW guys on the card, and says that he also saw a lot of talented JAPW guys, too.  He finally gets around to Pete from Tough Enough.  Pete comes to ringside, and Candido berates him for sleeping with one of the ladies that he was competing against on TE…if you watched the show, then you already know that the chick that he slept with had a boyfriend back home.  If not, then buy this tape, because Candido lays it all out for ya!  Pete eventually rushes the ring, but he is no match for Mr. No Gimmicks Needed.  For some reason there is no security around to break this one up, but that’s ok with me because after Pete starts to take control, Candido’s true gimmick begins to shine through…he’s wrasslin’s Homer Simpson!!

Da Hit Squad w/Jonny D. v. Axl Rotten & Balls Mahoney – The sun has gone down as DHS makes their way to the ring, and I am positive that the dude in the second row is smokin’ a joint…otherwise he is passing a cigarette!  This match marks the reunion of the Hardcore Chair Swinging Freaks.  During the introductions, Da Hit Squad get in the face of the ring announcer, telling him to announce them as the 4-Time JAPW Tag Team Champions.  The announcer adds the word “former” to the introduction, and damn near gets his ass kicked for his troubles!  Axl gets on the mic before the match gets started, and tells us not to listen to the internet rumors that he is dead.  He also coaxes the crowd and DHS into making the match a no-DQ, Falls Count Anywhere affair.  The ref begins to object, presumably because they are not in a building, so Axl tells the ref that he can disqualify them if he wants to, but then he will have about 300 fans that will try and kick his ass if he does.  Balls starts the match against Monsta Mac, who dumps Mahoney on his head with a Belly to Back Suplex.    That’s about as close as the match gets to being a technical wrasslin’ classic…unless you want to count the Greco Roman Punches.  They go outside and brawl around ringside, where someone passes Balls a gallon jug of water!  Jug o’ water to the head of Mafia, and then Clear Mist to the face from Mahoney!!  That’s good stuff.  Monsta Mac and Axl have battled to the merchandise table, and Axl is bleeding heavily from the forehead.  They start to head back towards the ring, where Mafia is firmly in control of Balls Mahoney.  Mafia then brings a ladder into the ring and props it against the turnbuckles in the corner.  Irish Whip is reversed, and Mafia goes into the ladder.  Balls starts to climb to the top turnbuckle, but he gets crotched by Mafia, and then Mafia and Monsta Mac double-team for a big slam out of the corner.  Monsta Mac motions that he needs a chair, and in a retro-moment, about 30-40 chairs come flying out of the crowd.  This creates a pile of steel chairs in the middle of the ring.  Axl is suplexed onto the chairs, 1, 2, and 3.  Your winners are Da Hit Squad.

Low Ki v. Steve Corino – There’s something about Steve Corino for me.  From the first time I saw him in ECW (with brown hair), I’ve enjoyed just about everything he’s done.  Although I have to admit that it wasn’t until he bled all over the mat in matches against Tajiri, and then Jerry Lynn, that I started to admire his in-ring talents as much as his mic work.  Incidentally, before I get started…if you want to laugh your ass off, get the “Shoot” interview that Corino does with RF Video.  He describes in detail how he was involved in some of the most famous angles in wrasslin’ history…and then he’ll come in at the end with something like, “I broke my ankle the week before we taped for tv, and so they had to write me out.”  He takes-over the RF offices and forces one of their employees to be his errand-boy…I’ve already said enough, here’s the link, go buy it.  Low Ki is also one of my favorites right now, but for all the exactly opposite reasons.  I first saw him in some “Best of the Indies” tape, and it was like watching a tweeked-out version of The Great Muta…without the mist.  I started looking for tapes based on whether Low Ki had a match or not (that played no small part in my decision to buy the tape that I am recapping now).  Then all of a sudden, in TNA, he cut a badass promo to set-up the Triple Ladder Match.  Holy shit!  The guy cuts a promo that demands your attention.  Have I given you enough of an indication that I’m stoked for this match?  Good.  Let’s get on with it…

The match is slow to start, which gives the announcers the opportunity to discuss the accomplishments that each man has achieved at the world’s most famous bingo hall…Low Ki won the JAPW Heavyweight Title from Homicide at Viking Hall, while Corino was on the card for the last ECW show at what was then called the ECW Arena (Corino was victorious).  There is not a lot of action to call during the first five minutes or so of the match, as they are putting on a mat-based submission style clinic.  Neither man is able to gain a prolonged advantage until Ki winds up on top and connects with a series of stiff punches.  Low Ki stays on him, not letting Corino get to his feet, landing kicks, armbars, etc.  As Corino eventually gains control briefly, the camera gives us a close-up and we see what appears to be “Colby” written in Japanese on his wrist tape.  Ki connects with his patented three-kick series, but gets only a two-count.  He whips Corino into the corner and follows him in with a Cartwheel Kick, but Corino ducks out of the way and hits a Superkick as Low Ki turns around.  Corino wants to know, “Who’s the man!?”  Snap Mare positions Ki on the mat, and Corino comes off the ropes with a Dropkick on the seated Low Ki.  Just when it looks like Ki is about to take control, he ducks his head and Corino hits a series of three Suplexes, holding him up for the third one, allowing the blood to rush to Ki’s head.  That’s like a new school/old school hybrid!  Ki is down in the corner, and Corino rakes his boot across the eyes and nose.  How very heelish of him!  He comes off the ropes, with a running boot across the face, which Ki sells like it ripped his face off!  Off the ropes, Low Ki ducks a Clothesline and springboards off the opposite ropes with a kick to the head.  Both men are slow getting to their feet, as the match passes the fifteen-minute mark.  After another series of kicks from Low Ki, he finally connects with the Cartwheel Kick.  Corino perched in the corner, but he holds on as Ki goes for a Huricanrana from the top.  The King of Old School is on him right away, and out of nowhere he hits the Old School Expulsion!!  1, 2, no!  Corino calls for a Brainbuster, but Low Ki slips out of it and tries to lock-in the Ki Krusher ’99…Corino with a Roll-Up, 1, 2, 3!!  Holy shit!  Corino slides out of the ring immediately, and is out of the ringside area before his music fully gets kicked in.

I appreciate the old-school style, and even the finish to the main event.  As for the entire tape, I definitely liked it, but I don’t think that there are any MOTY candidates here.  That does NOT mean that I don’t recommend this show…I certainly do.  The matches that I will wind-up going back and watching again include the 3-Way Dance with the SAT, the Dixie match(es), and of course the main event.  Oh, and did I mention that I am a recently converted Homicide mark, so anything with him in it gets a thumbs-up from me, and he won the Heavyweight Title on this tape!  With that much going for it, I’m definitely gonna label this one a keeper, and you will too…so check-out ModTrom Video for all your JAPW needs!

Well, that about does it for me.  Thanksgiving is just a day or two away (depending on when Rick gets this posted), and we will be visiting Amey’s dad for the holiday…he is the only one of our four parents that will party with us, so I have that to look forward to!  What do you have to look forward to from me, wrasslin’ recap wise?  Well, I just don’t know.  I bought a DVD called Bloodbath: Wrestling’s Most Incredible Steel Cage Matches at Best Buy, and I am having an internal debate about whether or not I should recap it, because it is a WWE production.  I should have plenty of time to make-up my mind, because I don’t think that I will be doing another recap before the end of the year (although I may surprise you).  The reason for the long layoff is that I am going to start reviewing some of my old ECW tapes, in preparation for a big column commemorating the anniversary of their last ppv.  I have decided on a format for that column, by the way.  In order that it will still read like a recap, and in keeping with the End o’ the Year Poll vibe that will be going on in January, I am going to do a Top Ten (or Twenty) list of my favorite matches, promos, angles, and Joel Gertner poems from my video library.  Hopefully that will be more entertaining for you to read than just another History of ECW column.  Anyway, like I said, I might surprise you and send Rick something next month…I’ve got a couple of tapes that are kinda short that I could do, but I’m not gonna start promising anything.  Except that I’m going to have a blast in Waco for Thanksgiving, and I hope that y’all enjoy the holiday season, too.

PEACE

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